Chapter 105
In less than a day, Lin Qingyu seemed to be a completely different person. Who would have thought that the powerful official who not long ago, led the new emperor to the throne was at this moment, curled up in the emperor’s arms, face pale and wan, his slightly disheveled long hair blocking his side profile, looking like a nesting bird.
Jiang Xing could tell that Lin Qingyu was working hard to get back to normal. But Lin Qingyu had been so agitated, how could he possibly recover with a snap of his fingers? It was only by being by his side all the time and coaxing him patiently was Jiang Xing able to gradually lead him out of the shadows.
Xu Junyuan, who was the only person apart from Lin Qingyu who knew about Jiang Xing’s identity, was forcibly kept in the palace simply to create more opportunities for the young couple to be alone together, to let them breathe and have some air. The grand and noble National Teacher was treated like a eunuch by Jiang Xing. There was no other way. Were anyone to see General Gu’s wife lingering with the new emperor on the dragon bed, whispering sweet nothings to each other, it would be nothing short of a bloodbath.
After taking the medicine for a couple of days, together with Jiang Xing’s company, Lin Qingyu’s mood stabilized for the meantime. He would though still occasionally find himself in a trace. Sometimes he couldn’t even remember whether he was dreaming or in the real world. When he listened to others talking to him, it always seemed like there was some sort of barrier, as if the speaker were under water.
Lin Qingyu knew that this was a side effect of the mood stabilizing medicine. Drinking too much made you lethargic and sleeping too much produced more dreams.
Once his condition showed signs of turning for the better, Lin Qingyu updated him on matters that had been happening while he had been in the Northwest — How he moved against Xi Rong and Xiao Jie and how he helped Xiao Li ascend to the throne. He spoke unhurriedly and clearly but when he reached the part of the story about the change in the palace, he suddenly stopped, pausing for a long time. When he spoke, he did so with a dazed calm, asking, “I…what was I just saying? ”
Jiang Xing patiently wrote: 【You received a secret letter from the Xixia agent. 】
Lin Qingyu nodded and said, “After that, I headed to the palace.”
Jiang Xing wrote: 【Is Xi Rong dead? 】
Lin Qingyu shook his head. “I was thinking of keeping him alive so as to serve as a sacrifice when you triumph.”
Jiang Xing’s eyes went a little cold. 【Forget it. It will only mar my battle banner. 】
Lin Qingyu was stunned. He threw off the quilt and made to get out of bed. “Then I’ll go and take his life right now so as not to dirty your banner.”
There was an uncomfortable feeling in Jiang Xing’s chest. He smiled and called out “Baobei”. He put his previous notes to the candle to burn them. He pulled over another stack of paper and wrote: 【Let’s not talk about him right now. Let’s talk about something important. 】
Lin Qingyu watched him write seriously and asked, “What would you like to talk about?”
【Qingyu, although it was in a dream, we did consummate our marriage, right? 】
【Why don’t we review that? How did it feel? 】
After Jiang Xing finished writing, he waited nervously and expectantly for Lin Qingyu’s answer. He almost couldn’t bear it and nearly took it back but in order not to make Lin Qingyu angry, he forcefully overcame his instinct.
Lin Qingyu thought for a while and said, “It seemed like…it hurt.”
Jiang Xing: …
Lin Qingyu narrowed his eyes and smiled, “But when I think about how it’s you, it also feels really good.”
The corners of Jiang Xing’s lips rose up in a smile and he wrote, with lively and vigorous flourishes: 【I also felt really good. It felt amazing inside you, Baobei. I like it a lot.】
Lin Qingyu looked at the “dirty talk and obscene language” all over the paper and his cheeks flushed slightly. What Lin Qingyu didn’t know was that Jiang Xing’s face was also burning hot. The outwardly seventeen-year-old boy who had written these flithy words with his own hand, was, in his heart, no less nervous and embarassed.
It’s a pity that Jiang Xing and Lin Qingyu had made love while weighed down with despair at that time. No matter how much physical pleasure there had been, it was always covered by a layer of gloom.
But it didn’t matter. He believed that he and Lin Qingyu would be able to move past that.
Lin Qingyu put away Jiang Xing’s note and said in a low voice, “We can’t let others see this.” He was about to burn the paper when his wrist was suddenly grabbed and then Jiang Xing was moving in closer.
Jiang Xing was about to kiss him.
Lin Qingyu’s pupils reflected Xiao Li’s face. He wanted to close his eyes like last time, but it was too late. His body froze instinctively and he turned his face to avoid the kiss.
Jiang Xing let him go. Feeling a little wronged, he picked up a brush and slowly drew on the paper: 【? 】
【No kissing? 】
Lin Qingyu composed himself and said, “I seem to be a little uncomfortable with your current body.”
【Eh? But this body is the most similar to my original one. 】
“I know.” Lin Qingyu was a little distressed, “It’s just that I know Xiao Li.”
Before Jiang Xing became Lu Wancheng and Gu Fuzhou, he had never met these two people and he could more easily accept that Jiang Xing had their appearance. But he knew Xiao Li. Not only did he know Xiao Li but he often spent time with him this year. Xiao Li would smile at him whenever he fed him. And he had personally put on Xiao Li the crown symbolizing his position as emperor. To him, Xiao Li really existed.
Jiang Xing understood what Lin Qingyu wanted to express and wrote: 【When I transferred to Xiao Li’s body, Xu Junyuan said it was “the soul returning to its old body”. You can think of me and Xiao Li as the same person because for some reason, my soul wandered outside for a while and only now came back. 】
Lin Qingyu looked at him: “Well, now that you’re back, does that mean you won’t leave again anymore?”
【Definitely. 】
Seeing Jiang Xing being so sure, Lin Qingyu suppressed his restlessness and anxiety and smiled lightly. “I’ll get used to it as soon as possible. If you kiss me again, I won’t avoid it anymore.”
Jiang Xing smiled and pecked Lin Qingyu’s lips, light like a dragonfly skimming the water. A bit of haze, though, remained in Lin Qingyu’s eyes.
Lin Qingyu said he couldn’t control it but he was still trying to control it even now. As everyone knows, a beauty who is quiet and does not cry or make a fuss is more distressing than a beauty who is emotionally broken.
Lin Qingyu has been recuperating for three days and on the surface, he has already recovered. For the past few days, the Empress Dowager has been governing from behind the curtain but she was already showing signs that she was reaching her limit. Having learned that Lin Qingyu has almost recovered, under the cover of visiting the sick, she insinuated, “Qingyu, you need to get better soon. There are many matters that Aijia has been waiting on your decision for.”
Lin Qingyu said lightly, “Thank you, Your Highness, for your concern.”
The Empress Dowager sighed, “There has been no news from the Northwest for a long time. I wonder how Gu Fuzhou fared in the battle for Yongliang.”
Lin Qingyu’s expression suddenly changed and his breathing turned rapid. With Lin Qingyu’s current state, how could he bear to hear this? In order to prevent the empress dowager from continuing on, Jiang Xing said, “Mother.”
The empress dowager suddenly froze, thinking that she had heard wrong. “…Li’er?”
Jiang Xing called again, “Mother.”
“The emperor spoke?” The empress dowager was very excited, tears started streaming down her cheeks. Gone was her usual dignified and graceful manner. “The emperor called Aijia ‘mother’!”
Nurse Xiujiao was also choked up, “This is the first thing the emperor has said. The emperor has truly kept you in his heart!”
The Empress Dowager couldn’t restrain herself and she fell bitterly on Jiang Xing’s shoulder. “Li’er, you really are getting better…Mother, mother has waited so long for this day.”
It was impossible for Jiang Xing to pretend to be a dullard all his life. But he also couldn’t suddenly become a normal person. There had to be a gradual process. Today he called his mother, next year he will be reciting poems and in three to five years he will be able to do math problems.
【You know, playing a dullard’s not so bad. 】Jiang Xing told Lin Qingyu, 【Besides, I don’t feel much like talking to anyone except you. 】
Jiang Xing’s “mother” had caused the empress dowager to cry until she was out of breath and couldn’t even go to court the next day. Lin Qingyu changed into his official uniform and sat in front of a bronze mirror. He looked at himself with a blank expression. Suddenly, feelings of being fed up unexpectedly welled up.
Before he could be discovered by Jiang Xing, he immediately closed his eyes.
——Forget it. Jiang Xing has returned. Worrying about personal gains and losses, crying and wailing, how am I any different from Xiao Jie and his ilk? Do you want to become the kind of person you despise the most?
But, was Jiang Xing really back? Could it be that he was dreaming again? Once he wakes from his dream, Jiang Xing would leave too.
Lin Qingyu opened his eyes and saw through the bronze mirror the emperor standing behind him, helping him adjust his official hat. He quietly picked up the hairpin on the table and slowly stabbed the sharp end into his palm.
Pain…It’s not a dream. That’s great.
Before Lin Qingyu could breathe a sigh of relief, the hairpin in his hand was snatched away by Jiang Xing.
“Qingyu?”
Lin Qingyu paused and said, “Your Majesty.”
Jiang Xing’s brow furrowed and then loosened. He said with a smile, “I’m Jiang Xing. Don’t-don’t forget.”
After practicing hard for a few days, he gradually regained the feeling of speaking and was able to speak short sentences.
The corners of Lin Qingyu’s lips twitched. “I remember. Jiang Xing is the emperor now. So it’s only right that I address you as such.”
Jiang Xing lowered his head to check the wound on Lin Qingyu’s palm. Fortunately, he had spotted it in time. Though the skin was broken, it wasn’t bleeding. Lin Qingyu said indifferently, “It’s fine. I’ll just apply some medicine to it.”
Lin Qingyu called Xiao Songzi to bring the medicine box and calmly applied the medicine on himself. Jiang Xing looked at him thoughtfully for a while, but he didn’t help him. Suddenly, Jiang Xing raised his hand to take off the jade crown on his head. He picked up the scissors lying to one side and cut off his long hair without hesitation.
Strands of black hair fell to the ground and within a short while, the young man’s hair changed from long to short.
Lin Qingyu sat dazed for a long time before saying, “Jiang Xing…?”
Jiang Xing curved his lips into a smile, “Yes, Baobei?”
Lin Qingyu said in a daze, “What are you doing…why did you make yourself to look like this?”
Jiang Xing had messed up his hair. It was all uneven lengths, like a dog had chewed it. Fortunately, with his face, even with such a mess for hair, he was still extremely handsome and radiant.
…Exactly the same as Jiang Xing in his dream.
He watched with his own eyes how the long-haired “Xiao Li” completely transformed into the short-haired Jiang Xing.
He still remembered how when Jiang Xing lowered his head, the bangs on his forehead brushed against his eyelashes.
Jiang Xing tried hard to speak, but forgot how to say that word. He had no choice but to resign himself to writing and holding up. 【I’m more handsome this way. 】
After several days of being in a trance, Lin Qingyu finally regained his sense of reality and the voice in his ear became clear.
Jiang Xing got down on one knee in front of Lin Qingyu. He looked up at him, “Qingyu, it’s me, Jiang Xing.”
Lin Qingyu involuntarily stretched out his hand and cupped Jiang Xing’s face, as if relieved, as if trusting, as if sighing. “You’re really back.”
Jiang Xing struggled to speak. “I’ve been back for a few days.”
The mist in Lin Qingyu’s eyes gradually dissipated and clarity returned. He suddenly pinched Jiang Xing’s chin tight with his hand, his eyes turned sharp. “Oh, so you actually know how to come back, huh!”
Jiang Xing didn’t feel any pain at all but pretended to frown tightly. “Be gentle, Baobei.”
At this time, Xiao Songzi’s voice came from outside. “Master Lin, Master Li and the others are waiting to discuss matters with you in Qinzheng Hall.”
Lin Qingyu’s eyes darkened. He looked around and tore a strip of cloth from the curtain. Jiang Xing consciously and even feeling a bit of excitement, stretched out his hands. “Here.”
Lin Qingyu tied Jiang Xing’s hands with the cloth strip. “Go to the bed and wait for me under the quilt. You are not allowed to go anywhere until I come back.”
Did such a good thing actually exist in this world?
Jiang Xing nodded happily.
