Chapter 52 – Florida Man Revives 6-YO Girl Using Tea and Food after Allegedly Killing Her with Radiation
Leo had no time to play with Qi Niu. He put on rubber gloves, preventing the girl from touching his skin.
"Lady, my body is hazardous. If you touch me, you will die."
Qi Niu didn't give up. She undid two more buttons, revealing more of her skin.
"Senior, what is your type? Big breasts? Small breasts? Or, are you into something special? I know a few techniques. Do you want me to show you?"
Again, Leo started to get annoyed. He bellowed, "Stop that. If you don't, I'll kick you out of the store. This is my last warning!"
"…"
Qi Niu paused and glared into Leo's eyes. She was offended, but she couldn't voice her frustration.
'I swallow humiliation and lower myself, yet you ignore me?! How dare you!? Do you think you're better than the others? You're not the only rich man in this world! Fine, I'll find another man!'
The girl gave up seducing Leo. She snorted and stomped out of the store without purchasing anything.
Seeing how the girl reacted, Leo snorted. He was relieved that he managed to shake off a troublemaker.
"Next!" Leo called for a new customer. He looked out the window.
However, Xu Nuan and the disciples didn't hear him. They surrounded a floating little girl and shouted in panic.
"QIQI!"
"WHAT'S HAPPENING?!"
"MEOW?!" Even Cat was among them.
Qi Niu was also shocked. However, she clicked her tongue and observed the group from the side, not participating in the commotion.
Leo was different. He observed Yao Qiqi and Cat. Then, he noticed that the girl was holding a bundle of immortal grass flowers.
"Flowers?! Flowers from the immortal grass?!"
Leo approached the crowd. He was planning to ask Cat and Xu Nuan about the girl. But suddenly, Yao Qiqi emitted a strange aura, which didn't belong in this world. Xu Nuan and others could only see a rainbow aura from Qiqi, but Leo saw something familair.
'Isn't that…?'
Leo remembered the phenomenon. He gazed at Xu Nuan, and their eyes met.
"S-Senior Florida Man. We're so sorry. I've never imagined that one of my people will experience a breakthrough like this."
"Breakthrough?"
Leo inwardly laughed. This was not a cultivation breakthrough.
50,000 years ago when Leo was still a regular human, he went through a similar ordeal. The fallout radiation turned every cell in his body into cancer cells, and they mutated everything – arms, hands, feet, legs, stomach, chest, face, eyes, ears, mouths, and innards. However, the cells kept him alive. Leo remembered that he begged other people to kill him as he couldn't tolerate the pain, but everybody was also hit by the radiation and died. In the end, Leo waited for his death alone on the street of corpses.
His cancerous cells destroyed all human cells, organs, bones, and a portion of his brain. Leo remembered that his consciousness went back and forth between the ray of light and the abyssal darkness several times during the process. When Leo came back to his senses, he found himself in the same body, but he aged significantly. In exchange for the rapid aging, the cancer cells reverted to good cells, and his bones and muscle fibers were stronger than before.
Moreover, Leo found himself inside a strange spaceship of an alien, but that was a story for another time.
Looking at Yao Qiqi in the ray of light, Leo recalled the bright light that he had seen during his first mutation. He wondered if it was the same.
'Poor girl. If she goes through what I did, she would lose her mind. The pain is not something a kid can endure.'
Leo gave Cat a meaningful look, scolding her with his eyes.
Cat was taken aback. She shook her head, denying her responsibility. She also pointed at the flowers and blamed them for the phenomenon.
"…"
Leo snorted and turned around. He ran into the store and entered his bedroom. Looking under the bed, Leo grabbed a Tupperware box of the newly made elixir grain pill, which he had hidden from Cat and Wu Buyi.
.
Medium-Grade Elixir Grain Pill
Satisfy the hunger for 120 hours.
Increase metabolism and regenerative abilities for 25 days.
Increase lifespan by 50 years.
Increase five elemental Qi by 50 years' worth of cultivation.
.
Had Wu Buyi seen it, it would have driven him crazy. However, Leo kept these pills in case of emergency as they could be used as a temporary healing pill.
Leo picked one of them from the box and stored the container in the same place. He then picked a bottle of rejuvenate tea and rushed out to see the little girl.
As soon as Leo arrived, he witnessed a nightmarish scene – Yao Qiqi's arms and legs swelled and bloated like a heinous t-virus-infected zombie in Resident Evil Series. The disciples screamed in fright while Xu Nuan's face was as pale as a sheet. Even Cat started crying, regretting that she had given Qiqi the flowers.
Leo walked with long strides. He jumped and caught the floating girl. Then, he landed on the ground with the little girl in his arm. Then, Leo tossed the banquet of immortal grass flowers away.
Noticing that Leo touched the girl, Xu Nuan and the girls were shocked. It was common knowledge that a cultivator during a breakthrough was sensitive to bodily contact. Had a cultivator been touched during their advancement, the cultivator would have suffered from the Qi deviation as the touch might destroy the Qi flow.
In this case, Yao Qiqi was in danger of Qi deviation! Her Qi could go berserk!
"NO! HER ADVANCEMENT WILL BE RUINED!" Xu Nuan panicked.
On the other hand, Leo didn't care. He crushed the grain pill into small pieces. As Leo was not into romantic stuff, he simply poured the crushed pill into her mouth. Then, he opened the cog of Rejuvenate Tea bottle and slowly poured the content down her throat, forcing her to swallow the grain pill along with the tea.
.
High-Grade Rejuvenate Tea
Regenerate and restore bone marrow.
Decrease physical age by 7 years per liter.
Increase metabolism by 35% for 168 hours.
Medium chance to increase appetite.
.
Leo had no idea if the tea could help, but he had to risk it all. After all, every medicine he got was her last hope.
CREAK-CRACK
The sound of cracking bones scared Leo. He bitterly gazed at the little girl in his arm, begging heaven and hell to spare her. While Leo gazed at Yao Qiqi's face, he also checked her lifespan status.
.
Name: Yao Qiqi
Age: 6
Remaining Lifespan: 399 Years, 6 Months, 9 Days, 9 Hours, and 2 Minutes
.
"399 Years?!"
As Leo hadn't checked Qiqi's lifespan earlier, he didn't know if the tea and the pill worked. Still, as she had a long life, Leo didn't believe that she would perish because of a simple radiation mutation.
CREAK
The swelling arms and legs slowly subsided and reverted back to normal limbs. Yao Qiqi's complexion got a lot better, but she sweated profusely. She was still in pain, and Leo could feel the heat coming from her skin.
Leo let out a long sigh as she survived the critical condition. He took off one of his gloves and swiped the sweat drops on her face.
"Ah…"
"Meow!!!"
At that moment, Leo and Cat's hearts sank. The former made a mistake.
He touched Yao Qiqi with his bare hand!
Leo tightly closed his eyes, blaming his stupidity and muscle memory. He just wanted to help the little girl, but he might have harmed her instead.
Without saying anything, Leo bit his lower lip and gestured for Xu Nuan to carry her instead.
Xu Nuan carefully received Yao Qiqi and princess-carried her. Leo was also careful not to touch Xu Nuan with the hand without a glove. After passing the responsibility to the woman, Leo deeply sighed.
"I did my best to help. Let's pray that she can turn this ordeal into a fortuitous encounter and become a main character of this era."
Leo said without thinking as his mind was still in chaos. He wanted to apologize to Xu Nuan for his blunder, but his brain couldn't come up with the right words.
Meanwhile, Xu Nuan and the girls gazed at Leo in awe and respect as his mysterious medicine and tea suppressed the swelling and bloating symptoms instantly. They believed that Leo sincerely helped Yao Qiqi.
While carrying Yao Qiqi, Xu Nuan lowered her head, "Thank you for saving her, senior! Without you, I don't know how Qiqi would survive this!"
The other girls also knelt. They cupped their fists and spoke in unison, "Thank you for saving our little sister!"
Leo heavily scratched the back of his head and grumbled. He felt bad, and he wanted to confess.
Suddenly…
RUMBLE
Yao Qiqi's body emitted rainbow light again!
However, this time, Xu Nuan could sense Qi inside the little girl. She sensed a small dantian crystal in her belly.
Yao Qiqi just condensed a dantian, which every Qi Condensation Stage cultivator strived to complete. However, this little girl did it instantly. Her cultivation base skipped the Muscle Tempering Stage and the Qi Condensation Stage! Her status rose to the Foundation Establishment Stage!
That was not all, Xu Nuan sensed more than one type of element Qi inside her!
"Qiqi… Oh, my goodness. You…"
Xu Nuan found a trace of Fire Qi, Water Qi, Wood Qi, Earth Qi, and Metal Qi inside her!
Yao Qiqi could cultivate five elements at once!
The little girl slowly opened her eyes and blinked several times. She gazed at Xu Nuan's face, which was full of tears.
"Grandma. I had a bad dream and a good dream."
"Yes, Qiqi?"
"I dreamt that I was eaten alive by blood monsters. I was drowning in a blood pool, and the blood pool turned into a monster. It was so painful."
Xu Nuan slowly put the girl down. She brought out a handkerchief and wiped Yao Qiqi's sweat. The other girls also surrounded the little girl and fanned them with their skirts, circulating the airflow for the two.
Leo immediately raised his hand and blocked his view. Then, he turned around. He didn't want to take advantage of these adolescent girls and looked at their underwear. After turning around, he raised his eyebrows.
'Wait, she's okay?'
Leo patted his chest and deeply exhaled. He almost had a heart attack. While he stood there, he eavesdropped their conversation.
Yao Qiqi continued narrating her dream, "But then, grandma. I saw a handsome angel."
"An angel?" Xu Nuan and the girls were curious. Some of them glanced at Leo and repeated her word.
"Handsome angel?"
"Yes, sister! A handsome angel rescued me from the monster and fed me a delicious pill and water. Then, he gave me a blessing touch. When he touched my face, I was no longer in pain!"
"…"
While his back faced the group of women, Leo widened his eyes in bemusement. He thought that his touch would have killed her.
'Wait. My touch helped her? But how?!'
Leo coughed several times as he choked. He also facepalmed and shook his head, confused and baffled by this event.
On the other hand, Xu Nuan and the girls quickly connected the dots. They gazed at Leo in respect.
Xu Nuan concluded her thought and explained to everybody, "Senior Florida Man is your savior, Qiqi. He fed you a medicine pill and healing water. Then, he cured you."
The girls nodded in agreement as they saw everything. Even Qi Niu who had a malicious thought couldn't help but agree.
"AHEM!"
Leo was still choking. He cleared his throat and walked back to his store, hiding the complex expression on his face. He tried to change the subject.
"Well, everything is my fault since I didn't teach my pet correctly. As an apology, I'll give everybody a bottle of rejuvenate tea for free, but I'll only give it to those who buy at least one of my items by using their lifespan."
The girls deeply bowed toward Leo. Even Xu Nuan had the urge to kowtow to him.
Yao Qiqi got back on her feet. She turned to Leo and bowed 90 degrees. Then, she shouted, "THANK YOU FOR SAVING MY LIFE, SENIOR HANDSOME ANGEL! YAO QIQI WILL NEVER FORGET THIS FAVOR!"
The girls giggled while Leo's face reddened in embarrassment. He was bad at taking compliments, especially if someone suddenly called him handsome.
Leo coughed, "AHEM! Alright. Next person, please. I don't have all day to entertain you."