Those were the events Damien experienced in death.
And for that reason, they couldn't be properly explained.
After all, Damien's ego and soul experienced two different situations that acted in tandem to reach the final outcome.
But the actual transformation of his soul happened in the absence of his ego, so naturally he didn't know what it entailed.
At least, not at that time.
What did Damien experience in death?
The truth was, he experienced nothing.
Because Damien didn't allow himself to die even though all conventional definitions considered him dead.
He didn't allow himself to stop existing even though his ego was quite literally in the depths of nonexistence.
Because of his unique existence, he could define himself within nonexistence and feel its presence, rather than becoming a part of it like the ego of any other individual.
When Damien's ego and soul combined into their true form, and he finally felt the blackness that now formed his soul, he partially understood what happened.
[Condition Achieved: True Death.]
That notification was the key.
It didn't come from the system.
It tried its best to mimic the system, but Damien knew better.
The Void sent him that notification.
As he grew, he became closer to the Void and gained more control over its energy.
In the current time, he rarely used his other laws on their own. Even when he used Spacetime, Samsara, or Elemental, he used them by transforming the Void into their individual forms.
Many of his previous techniques became useless because of this change, but at the same time, they became more profound than ever.
And his fighting style experienced a complete transformation.
Yet, there was always something missing.
He was always blocked by walls that shouldn't have existed. His internal logic held him back and formed those walls of inevitability that had been mentioned to death by now.
As the Void's Apostle, he should've been free from those barriers from the start. His position should've made them as flimsy as paper, allowing him to push through with just a bit of effort.
But why didn't that happen?
The answer was simple, yet another form of impossibility.
Damien was born a human.
His parents were Gods from the Heavenly World, and he carried their bloodlines.
His existence at a physical level was confined within a set of standards, even if those standards were a level above his peers.
However, the Void existed in a far higher realm than even the Heavenly World. Even the Heavenly World was born from the concepts birthed by the Void.
His soul was one that had existed for eternity.
Just like all the rest, it had been washed and reused countless times over the eons as people died and were reborn in new forms.
There was no way to avoid this. This was the absolute law of the universe, and how souls were managed by it.
How could he ever hope to truly reach the Void from this starting point?
Whether it was his soul or his body, they needed to change.
He already knew how to achieve this physically.
His Universe Baptism reconstructed his body in such a way that Void Mana became available to him, and that process was precisely what allowed him to comprehend the Breath of All Things and the Breath of Nothingness to make progress in his Void comprehension.
He would go through Cosmic Rebirth upon becoming a Demigod, and this process would occur for the second and final time, completing his evolution and perfecting his body.
However, his soul was another story.
Until now, he was unable to sense it at all. This was normal, since even the Void didn't change the fact that he was a lower existence.
He would only gain access to it during Cosmic Rebirth, and his soul would surely be affected by that process, but…
Unknown to him, that wasn't enough.
To completely reform his soul in the image of the Void, a condition needed to be met.
True Death.
His ego needed to be erased so the Void could take complete control over his soul and transmute it.
Even if his body was destroyed to the point where only a drop of blood remained, if he still had a possibility of revival, and if his ego was still attached to his soul, it was impossible to undergo this change.
Therefore, he needed to die at some point.
And that death could've never been expected or orchestrated by him.
Now that he'd been returned to his whole form, the change could be explained.
But there weren't many words that could be used to glorify it.
His soul was now a completely unique existence.
Damien had the choice to become a part of the Void, but he refused.
Instead, the Void integrated with him, and rather than being two existences with a power dynamic between them, they became one and the same.
Damien was never the Void's Apostle.
He was the Void personified.
Maybe not before, but that was his true identity, and he had now gained the qualifications to claim that title.
Damien's growth would no longer face hindrance.
Unlike other Divinities who had to slowly unravel the mysteries of the soul, Damien would have no problem once he underwent Cosmic Rebirth and joined their ranks.
The effects of this transformation couldn't be seen yet.
They wouldn't be seen for a while.
But, they couldn't be denied.
Because this was the foundation for Damien to become unparalleled.
As he became acclimated to his soul, he thoroughly ingrained the feeling of nonexistence in his memory so he would never forget what it felt like to almost disappear.
But now that the time had come, he couldn't resist the pull.
A living soul was not allowed to be in this space where only those who were being reborn could go.
Everything shattered around him like he was surrounded by walls of glass, and amidst light so unbelievably bright it caused one to feel reverence, his soul was pulled back into existence.
BANG!
A sharp inhale.
Cold air.
He didn't realize he wasn't able to feel these things before, because their concepts simply didn't exist around him.
But now…
He raised his hand.
His movements were clunky, but it eventually followed his command.
"It's real…"
His voice.
He could hear his voice.
His body was corporeal, not a vague shadow.
He was back.
He tried to expand his awareness, but he didn't seem able to control it quite yet.
His soul had returned to his body, but it hadn't settled in yet.
It would take some time for him to regain harmony.
But that didn't matter.
He could feel it.
Mana.
Atmosphere.
Earth.
Blood.
Vitality.
He could feel it all.
Those forces that told him without a doubt that he had returned to existence.
"Hahaha…"
He laughed listlessly.
Even he couldn't explain what just happened.
It was like no time had passed at all, but at the same time, it had been an eternity since he felt "reality" so vividly.
For a moment there, he was really gone.
His soul was removed from his control, and his ego was truly erased.
Just as he wished to happen when he died.
But now that he was alive, now that he'd been reborn…
It was terrifying.
The fact that he was actually dead until just a moment ago made him feel a chill within the depths of his soul.
No, that chill was not a product of his emotions.
It was a real force that forced him to remember.
It was a mark that would forever remain on his soul, the energy of True Death.
But that didn't matter.
All of these feelings and fears were just things he had to get used to or get over.
All that mattered was that he was back.
And he had much to do.
"Before all that…"
He spoke out loud just to hear the sound of his voice.
This simple thing he took for granted made him feel glorious.
He relished in it.
But…
"...where am I?"
