"Yes, you heard me correctly, and I only found out why I did so ever since I discovered that my son was still alive... ever since I became a Caretaker, ever since my husband became a warrior, not knowing if he would make it back home or not..."
"Yes, I understood my husband's sacrifices for the Village as a warrior and the burden that I need to carry as a Caretaker, the hard decisions that I need to make for the sake of the Village and that of the ordinary Villagers, but sometimes... I wished my husband had never been a warrior and I hadn't worked so hard to become a Caretaker," Caretaker Shani said, her tears becoming even more intense as they continuously rolled down from her eyes.
"I wished that instead of finding out about my child's life the way I did, I could have found out in a different way, just like how the rest of the ordinary villagers had. Then, that way, I would have believed that Naka was the one who had given me back my child in exchange for the loss of my husband. That way, I wouldn't have felt the way I'm currently feeling."
She then raised her hand to wipe away the tears that had stained her cheeks, properly wiping away the rest of her eyes. As her eyes became clearer, she focused on Orion.
"I think I might have overreacted when I said I hated this Village. What I really meant is that if I had an opportunity for my family to be like every other villager, surviving like every other villager within the Village, I would grab hold of such an opportunity without hesitation…"
"I… I think that I might have overestimated myself by thinking that I was the best candidate for the next Caretaker position when former Caretaker Hrok retired. Honestly, I don't know why I am telling you all of this; it's just that when I thought about who to talk to, you were the only one that popped into my mind," after she finished speaking, her gaze lowered towards the ground as her body slowly began to fidget, waiting in silence for Orion's response.
Meanwhile, after absorbing everything Caretaker Shani had shared, Orion found himself at a loss for words.
Since the day Caretaker Shani was reunited with her son, he had witnessed her emotional journey, observing her carrying him everywhere, even to her meetings. After a while, he assumed she was coping well, only to realize that she was far from okay from the current state of her emotions and the revelations she just made.
She appeared even more emotionally messed up than before.
'That explains why she looked normal,' Orion thought, inwardly sighing.
It didn't take a genius to grasp that Caretaker Shani's apparent normalcy resulted from her attempts to mask the turbulent emotional turmoil within her.
Observing her restlessness, Orion extended his hand and gently grasped hers. He was about to offer comforting words, but Caretaker Shani swiftly interjected, "Don't say anything. I don't want you to say anything." She raised her eyes, shaking her head with a strained smile.
A tranquil silence enveloped the room for several minutes as Caretaker Shani gradually regained her composure.
"Ahem!" Caretaker Shani suddenly cleared her throat.
"I would like to give you some things that my husband brings back home from his explorations," she said, her voice sounding much clearer than before, as though she hadn't just shed tears a minute ago.
Orion raised his brows at her words.
Although he already knew what the Warrior's explorations were about, that didn't mean he wasn't curious to see what the things they brought back looked like.
However, he was wise enough to understand that there were other ways to make that happen than getting it from the hands of someone like Caretaker Shani, who had just lost her husband and was more emotionally unstable than she seemed.
So, Orion quickly shook his head, "Caretaker Shani, I don't think that there's…" However, he was interrupted once more.
Caretaker Shani had already stood up, walked into her other room, and soon emerged with something wrapped within a thick piece of fabric, which she carried within her arms as she arrived and placed it before him silently so as not to wake up the baby behind her. She untied the fabric and opened it without hesitation, revealing what was within.
Orion's eyes immediately widened at the sight before him. Within the fabric were several rusted circuit boards that seemed to have been broken into smaller parts and wires, filling it up to the brim.
Suddenly, Orion noticed something else and picked up. He cleared off the accumulated dust on it before using both hands to open it gently just in case it was fragile.
It was a compass!
He wiped off the crystal-clear glass and saw the four cardinal directions, along with several other recognizable lettering and numbers beside it, with the long, pointed needle exhibiting two distinct colours. Eager to see if it was still functional, Orion shifted his hands to the side and watched as the needle moved.
"My husband saved these things to trade them the next time the Caravans come, so you don't have to worry. It's because I don't have it in me to barter with them when the Caravans arrive that I'm handing them over to you."
"Besides, you're a warrior, so these items should be much more valuable to you and the stronghold than just allowing them to gather dust here," Caretaker Shani said as she stretched her hands and wrapped them around Orion's, which were still holding the compass as if wanting him to accept what she had given without protest.
However, Orion immediately shook his head. He freed his hands from her grasp and carefully wrapped the compass back in the fabric.
Caretaker Shani observed the scene with her furrowed brows, but before she could say a word, Orion quickly interjected.
"I believe you should hold onto them for now and only hand them over to me when you're ready. Because, from what I can see, you aren't yet prepared," Orion responded with a serious expression.
