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Confession Cont. (2)
However, Li Hong Yuan nevertheless half knelt down, meeting with her line of sight, “There’s one thing that needs Wan Wan to clear up for this husband.”
“What?”
“Have you ever had feelings for Fu Yun Ting?” This bit was actually what Li Hong Yuan cared about the most.
Jing Wan blinked. Was it going along with him, or……………Jing Wan chose to tell the truth as is, “Ah Yuan, these words are really unreasonable, how can I possibly know.”
“The current Wu’an Marquis passed away. You married in during his mourning period. You and Fu Yun Ting also never consummated the marriage. About a month later, ‘today’, Fu Yun Ting similarly because of the power struggle of the various sides, step onto the path towards the northwest borders. Several months later, that one on the throne, because of underestimating Fu Yun Ting, just set his sights on the army rations. It was you that ran around everywhere, and afterwards, kneeled before the palace gates for several hours, in order to plea for the army rations, and then personally sent to the borders. Afterwards, you just stayed at the borders, all the way until the death of more than two hundred thousand Qi Yuan soldiers, and Fu Yun Ting got pinned with the crime of treason and got escorted back to the capital. The people of the Wu’an Marquis Manor all got imprisoned, and only you alone temporarily escaped, secretly returning to the capital, thinking of every way possible to save the others of the Fu family. Having nowhere else to go, you came to me. I admit, I was despicable and shameless, taking the opportunity to occupy your body, but at the time, you were still a virgin. That’s why, tell me, did you ever once have feelings for him? Even if you don’t know anything, you should understand your own situation, so you must know the answer.”
Jing Wan momentarily fell silent, reaching out to rest her hand on Li Hong Yuan’s face, “I can very definitively tell you, no.” What she herself was like, she was very clear. Her rationality will always be greater than her emotions. For her, it was impossible for something like ‘love at first sight’ to happen. If it really was as he said, then without a doubt, towards Fu Yun Ting, ‘she’ perhaps had some extremely special feelings, but it absolutely won’t be romantic feelings. As his legitimately wedded wife, even if the one that insisted on not consummating the marriage was Fu Yun Ting, in that kind of days where there might not be a tomorrow, if she loved him, then she absolutely won’t let herself stay a virgin. Moreover, it goes without saying, with the endless battles at the borders, everyone all might not even have a moment to rest, so the number of times ‘she’ and Fu Yun Ting can meet will inevitably be pitifully few. Then, how was it even possible to foster a relationship? And she, absolutely won’t because of some hero complex just fall in love with him. Respecting was one thing, but romantic love was another.
Li Hong Yuan reached out, embracing Jing Wan’s waist, having his head buried in her arms, “Wan Wan, I’m very happy, really.”
Jing Wan’s fingers caressed between his hair, feeling a bit sorrowful. Even if those things in his memories, she never want to experience, she still missed out on their first meeting. However, this kind of thing, it was also just thinking about it. After all, if she really was someone else’s wife, then no matter how good he was to her, she all won’t let go of herself, and would certainly restrain herself in all kinds of ways to the end. In the end, it was still the current her that gained all the benefits, not bearing any burdens, not having any pressure, and further don’t need to go care about those flowers by his side. Without him having experienced that first life, then even if they become husband and wife, the possibility of them having mutual love in the end was also extremely low, because he was a prince. Under a feudalistic society, how was it possible for a man to not have tongfangs before marriage, and after marriage, just stay by her side alone.
Although regretful, but one should further know how to be content. This man has gone through too many things not known to others, that heart can be said to be full of holes, so should properly cherish him and soothe his pain.
Jing Wan looked to the door lost in thought, and suddenly thought of something, “Ah Yuan, Gong mama was someone you arranged by my side?”
“Correct.” Li Hong Yuan didn’t deny, “The Imperial Noble Consort originally saved her, so the one she was wholeheartedly loyal to was actually the Imperial Noble Consort. Afterwards, although she served me, in reality, because some of my conduct and methods, she didn’t like, she merely just abided by her duties, nothing more than that. As a matter of fact, after I let her go to Qi’an Fu to serve you, in just two three years, I, this previous master, in her eyes, didn’t have any position at all.”
Jing Wan softly laughed, very much wanting to say that he deserved it, but she didn’t of any intention of blaming Gong mama. Even though Gong mama must have passed on quite a bit of information regarding her to a certain someone, but who let her be inseparably intimate with this man now. If not for having feelings, she more or less would get angry. However, she won’t fly into a rage either. After all, towards her, Gong mama has indeed spared no effort and was wholeheartedly good to her.
“What about Hei Mei and Bai Shao? Were they also sent to my side by you?”
“Yes, but these two were prepared for you from the start, so they don’t even know who the person that trained them was, thus not having another master.”
Jing Wan nodded, “My marriage arrangements, you must have interfered in. Based on your temper, how could you allow me to be betrothed to others?”
“With this prince’s reputation being that terrible, if your reputation is not bad, would you be able to marry me?” Li Hong Yuan replied rather boldly.
“Your reputation being terrible, that is also caused by you, who can you blame?”
TN: All
“If this prince’s reputation isn’t bad, would you have been able to become this di consort? Jin Qinwang Manor’s rear court would’ve long filled up.” Li Hong Yuan stared at Jing Wan, a look of ‘who did I do all this for’, and towards Jing Wan ‘not understanding his intentions’, he was quite upset.
“That’s why, you deliberately let me get betrothed and then have it cancelled again and again, just for the sake of ruining my reputation?” Jing Wan really was impressed by this logic of his. “But, it was also just twice, so no matter how bad, it still can’t compare with yours.”
“Originally prepared four, but Chen Zheng Min and Sun Yi Lin both harbored deep feelings towards you…………….” Li Hong Yuan’s expression darkened, his desire to kill rising again.
Something he caused himself, yet took his anger out on others. If she and those two never had an engagement, then even if they had feelings, it won’t be deep. After all, if never having the hope, then perhaps they will just give up sooner, “Because of this, your two plans afterwards just got abandoned?”
Already about to drown to death in vinegar, so how could he still continue!
“That’s why, just directly looked for your grandfather. In any case, the Luo family will inevitably be Jin Wangfei’s maiden family, so dragging into the waters sooner isn’t that big of a deal.”
Jing Wan facepalmed, “But even if you did all that, our marriage was still exchanged for using those things by me.”
Regarding this bit, Li Hong Yuan was quite happy, yet at the same time, it also became his dark history among dark histories.”
Seeing a certain someone’s complexion all about to drip ink, Jing Wan quickly lowered her head to kiss him, “The process isn’t important, as long as the outcome is satisfying.”
Li Hong Yuan’s complexion finally improved a little.
Normally, he was very much someone that appeared as if unexcelled in the world, aloof, taciturn, and arrogant, but in front of her, he was just like a small child.
Shortly after, Jing Wan asked him some other things, regarding the many people and matters that she cared about. However, quite a few things Li Hong Yuan all just vaguely responded and didn’t really ‘tell all that he knew’. Those things, for the most part, were all dark and cruel. Li Hong Yuan wanting to win Jing Wan’s pity was one thing, but the things that were truly too dark, he instead didn’t want to tell her.
Jing Wan also understood. Those were all the things that he has kept in his heart, unable to forget. “I will always be here.”
Li Hong Yuan naturally understood her meaning, but, “Qi Yuan is still unstable, the world still not at peace, and most importantly, Wan Wan’s ‘death ordeal’ has yet to pass.”
That’s why, until everything is settled, his heart will never be at peace? “Then, Ah Yuan, regardless of what you do, please think of me, alright? Moreover, since Ah Yuan has done this much, and changed this much, there won’t be a death ordeal anymore. We will both be well and slowly grow old together.”
“Of course, we’ll be well.” Unknown as to when, Li Hong Yuan’s posture already changed from half kneeling to directly sitting on the ground, his head leaning against Jing Wan’s leg, “There’s also one more thing that I need to tell Wan Wan. The reason why I was able to start over again was because of the Imperial Noble Consort. The things Grandmaster Liao Chen said, for the most part, were all true. The Imperial Noble Consort is indeed special, but exactly what her origins were, it is unknown. Her soul indeed still exist in the mortal realm, just it isn’t wandering about. Before I came back, she was trapped in a jade pendant, precisely that special jade pendant we discovered in Yucui Palace. After I came back, her soul entered Shu Consort Qin’s body, who had the closest fate with hers. Last time when Shu Consort Qin got poisoned, she temporarily gained control of Shu Consort Qin’s body, but because she’d sent me back in time, her soul will soon disperse. The eighty-one ceremonial altars, having the whole world pray for her, that is just for the sake of prolonging her existence. At least, long enough to fulfill some of her desires.”
Although there was already enough shocks today, Jing Wan was still quite surprised, “For the Imperial Noble Consort to have ended up in your imperial father’s hands, truly unfortunate.”
“If she didn’t end up in that man’s hands, then I wouldn’t have been born.” Li Hong Yuan bluntly said.
Jing Wan choked, at a loss for words.
That’s why, what they can do now is just give their best, and at least let her go without regrets?!
The matter of the ceremonial altars absolutely can’t have any mistakes.
“The things that I need to say have more or less all been said. Now, shouldn’t it be Wan Wan’s turn?”
Hearing this, Jing Wan wasn’t at all surprised. After all, even when having nothing at all, he was still able to turn the tables on all his brothers and ascend the throne, in addition to having a similar experience, how could he not detect?
“My situation is a little different from Ah Yuan’s.”
T/N: Regarding the Fu family, there’s some stuff that won’t be fully resolved until the first after story, due to neither LHY nor JW knowing the answer, because it took place in the previous timeline and because of the current changes, it will never be brought to light in this timeline.
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