After two hours of private lessons, the room appeared to be empty.
Tick-tock- Tick-tock-
It was a shattered space.
“…”
There, Sylvia was looking over the homework that Deculein had left. A revision of the magic circuit, a vocabulary list of fairy words with homonyms, and several math problems that he said would help… she looked at it all silently and muttered softly.
“I’m not afraid.”
The current Deculein was fake anyway. Everything would be fake until she painted the real one. All of them were processes, not results, of this trial and error. So, she didn’t have to be afraid if he disappeared. She didn’t have to be afraid of parting.
…Tweet.
All of a sudden, her familiar came chirping up to her shoulder. The let out a whine and climbed onto her lap.
“Yeah.”
Sylvia spoke to the two, who were worried about her.
‘You don’t have to worry. Nothing will change in the world I created. There will be no more loss.’
“It’s okay.”
She wasn’t swayed by a mere fake. With that determination, Sylvia began to solve Deculein’s homework. It was contradictory he was able to teach her when he was just a fake, but anyway.
“Don’t be swayed by fakes. That’s rather funny.”
Sylvia forced a smile.
“He said he felt sorry for me.”
Patting the panda’s head, she murmured.
“But I feel sorry for you.”
* * *
I returned to the guild room with Arlos’s scarecrow. The scarecrow was a well-made battle puppet even under the eye of Vision, so there was no need to worry about an attack.
-Professor.
The scarecrow moved its mouth abruptly.
—I’ve been thinking.
Pieces of straw flew out with her voice.
—Are you attacking Sylvia like this? With your death.
I shook my head.
“It could be an attack; it could be a teaching.”
A loss that Sylvia could not bear, the deep regret left behind. That was also why I made a point of finding her in the name of private tutoring. The experience of loss was, after all, an experience. Whether she let go of regret because of that experience or grew mature enough to endure loss, either way, was a good outcome for me.
“Arlos.”
-What.
“Why are you here?”
—…I told you.
“You didn’t say the exact reason. You hid it.”
The scarecrow continued quietly.
-Ahem!
As Arlos cleared her throat, lumps of straw splattered from its mouth.
“Have you come to cooperate with the Altar?”
—…
“You haven’t been in touch for quite some time before the Voice’s Island had appeared.”
—…
Arlos went silent. Again, Arlos was originally set as a villain. She cooperated with the Altar and eventually played a role in the advent of their god. That was why I was suspicious of the fact that she hadn’t been contacting me and that I found her in the Voice out of nowhere.
“Have you betrayed me?”
—…There is no such thing as a betrayal. Did you not think that it was just a simple cooperative relationship?
While walking like that, I arrived at the guild room.
“For me, that is betrayal.”
Creek-
When I opened the door to the guild room, I found Arlos’s main body. She was still sitting with her mask on today.
“…It was a response to the situation.”
Arlos looked at me.
“I know I was paid for giving you information about the Altar. However, I decided that the cost of the Altar was even greater.”
“The basis?”
I sat and stared at Arlos. An unfamiliar hostility crept into my eyes.
“…I naturally judged that.”
She let out a small sigh. She looked into the air as if recalling a far-off memory.
“Just before I came here, I had a glimpse of the manifestation consciousness of God.”
I frowned. Arlos shook her head.
“I knew at that moment. I can only live by sticking with them. It was a landscape that could not be described by mystery and magic. It was neither majestic nor holy. It was just overwhelming. I definitely felt God.”
Sand flowed down from the ceiling of the guild room. Arlos fiddled with her mask and bent down as if praying.
“I tried to use the Altar. Cooperating with the madness of resurrecting the god and trying to make money. I think the only constant value in this world is money. But the moment I saw it, it made me wonder if that was god.”
“So you judged wrong.”
I interrupted her. Arlos lifted her head to look at me, her frustration plain.
“That’s because you didn’t see-“
“He is not a god. He’s a madman.”
“…”
Was this the only reason she was set as a villain? I thought Arlos was being pathetic. No, it was funny how she was overwhelmed by a mere maniac. I shook my head, staring at that mask.
“Anyway, looking at you like this, I don’t think you should show this to the original me. The moment you catch my eyes, you will be stuffed.”
“If you had seen him with your own eyes-“
“I know. I also know the true name of the man the Altar calls a god. And I know who that damn madman is.”
“…What?”
Through the mask, Arlos’s eyes went large. Even though I wasn’t real, the script progress and quest structure from Kim Woojin’s memory was certain.
“He is a fake, not a god. He wouldn’t depend on believers if he were truly a god. Would a god ask a puppeteer to save his body? Not a god, but an asshole.”
“…”
Arlos closed her mouth.
“Arlos. I do not forgive betrayal. However, since the current me is more generous, I will give you a chance.”
“…Chance?”
“Will you believe in me, or will you believe in god? Decide before the original me arrives.”
“What decision?”
“You have Gerek, don’t you? If you release him when I come, I will die; if you do not release him, I will live.”
Arlos frowned. I grew frustrated looking at the parts of her face I could see, so I took off her mask before continuing.
“I’m going to entrust my life to you. And this is how I believe in people.”
If I believed someone, it was sure enough to entrust my life. If I didn’t, you would be my enemy for life. There was no need for an uncertain relationship.
“…You.”
When Arlos was about to say something-
Creek-!
Suddenly, the door to the guild room opened.
“Whew~, what a good meal!”
It was the chuckling Zukaken. Grease was thick on his lips as if he had eaten meat somewhere. He looked at the two of us and, startled, stepped back.
“What are you doing? Were you guys sharing your love for each other? Why are you so close?”
“…”
“…”
We backed down.
“Damn. I should have come back a little late. No, I should have taken a peek; what a shame. Kuhuhuhu.”
Zukaken came in chuckling and asked.
“Or can I join you-“
“Shut up. Is your mouth a garbage dump? To keep spitting out filthy words.”
Zukaken’s face hardened. His eyes and mouth widened with shock.
“…Hey. Gosh. Wow. I. Wow… that’s too much. I’ve been working hard outside all day, and that’s how you treat me?”
I ignored him as he crouched down and covered his face.
* * *
Another day, another day, and another day.
As time went by on the island, Sylvia’s tutoring continued at the same time every day. The more she learned, the more my body broke down. My imminent death now became vivid and took its place in my heart. This was also not satisfactory as it was natural, but it was acceptable to some extent.
Although my disappearance might be terrifying, I didn’t beg for life shamelessly.
“Good job. Today’s dictation score isn’t bad either.”
Sylvia’s room. Fortunately, today’s lesson was completed.
“…”
Sylvia watched me blankly. My time was running out like this, and the signs of collapse were clear enough for her to see.
“Is today the last lesson?”
She asked me. This was something worth being curious about. I shook my head.
“The lessons will continue.”
From the next me, the next me, and the next me. The lessons would not end.
“Then, you know. Can I ask you one thing?”
Sylvia asked as she looked at me carefully. Since the lesson was already over, she used no honorifics.
“Ask. Anything.”
“What kind of person was Yuli?”
That question was new, like a knife in the lungs. I looked at Sylvia and smiled. The name, Yuli, was strange. It was mysterious that besides me, someone knew her name.
“I’m curious.”
“…There’s nothing to be curious about. Yuli was just Yuli.”
I closed my eyes for a moment. I tried to recall her face, but her memory was blurred. Was it because that function was gradually failing?
“There is no other explanation.”
“…”
Then, Sylvia’s expression hardened. She exhaled a faint breath.
“You. Do you know?”
“What?”
“The Voice embodied Yuli, but it failed.”
“…”
“The embodied Yuli was just a shell. It was impossible to embody her soul. Do you know why?”
Then, my brow narrowed. The reason it was impossible, that was…
“Because souls are unique.”
The uniqueness of the soul. The principle is that there could be only one soul of one person in this world. The Voice was not free from this law either. The Voice was able to bring the dead back to life because the soul of the dead was not in this world but wandering the afterlife.
“In this world, Yuli’s soul is still out there. It’s alive.”
“…”
Sylvia, going silent, clenched her teeth.
“Didn’t Yuli die back then?”
There was compassion in Sylvia’s eyes as she regarded me. It mirrored the way I looked at her.
“Did Yuli run away because she hated you? Did she choose the worst way to be free from you? Is she still alive somewhere after running away?”
“…”
She could be if it were the setting that Yuli planted.
“I think so. That you were betrayed by Yuli. So, I also pity you.”
Sylvia stopped speaking and lowered her head. There was no hesitation in her voice, but sorrow spread across her face. Both of her eyes turned dark.
“I’m sorry. But the next, you will forget. Unlike me.”
“…”
I looked at Sylvia and nodded. Suddenly, I understood too. If Yuli were disappointed and left me, it would be worth writing down such a setting. No matter how much she thought about it, the only way to escape from Deculein’s mad love was to pretend to be dead.
“Isn’t it so?”
“…”
Sylvia watched me. There was a consideration in that silence and regret.
“…I see.”
I laughed and shook my head. Sylvia didn’t take her eyes off my face like a dog protecting its owner.
“But it’s fine.”
“…”
“I can endure it.”
Sylvia’s expression grew stiff. She straightened up and lowered her eyes.
“But… Sylvia.”
My body began to smudge.
“Before I die, I want to tell you something that no one has told you yet.”
I put a hand on her shoulder. It was an ugly hand, with wrinkled and falling-apart skin. A portrait before the collapse.
“Sylvia.”
She was still speechless but raised her eyes to look at me.
“…It’s not your fault.”
It’s not your fault that you turned out like this. It’s not your fault that you swallowed the Voice, that you’ve become so unhappy. Glitheon and Iliade. Deculein and Yukline. That the only thing that conflict between those two mages accomplished was sacrificing the child named Sylvia.
I didn’t have enough time right now to tell her all that, but she was a smart kid, so she should understand.
“…”
Sylvia let out a gasp. Her shoulders trembled softly. She stretched out her hand to touch my cheek. At that moment, my eyes were blinded, and I couldn’t see her face, but her warm breath tickled my nose.
“You’ll forget this too… anyway.”
Her voice quietly dispersed in a dark world. I could feel her hands pulling me into a gentle embrace. The feeling as she moved closer and caressed my lips, a soft kiss.
“I like you.”
A voice, trembling with tears and a confession of the purest feeling. In a world far away, a pure white light was sprouting from that darkness.
…My last memories.
