199.1 – A Lofty Ideal
The moment she understood this, rage engulfed her. Xue Qilin almost frantically tore off the white cloth, revealing the darkness that tightly bound Gong Tianqing.
Cuts, crisscrossing cuts, Gong Tianqing’s delicate, fair skin was destroyed by them.
At this moment, what fills Xue Qilin’s heart is not anger or surprise, but pure pain.
“She was hurt” — this fact is enough to overturn and sweep away all the existing emotions except lament.
“Young Ancestor, why do you… want to see?”
Feeling like sobbing, Gong Tianqing looked sadly at Xue Qilin, who has her eyes open wide and her lips pursed.
Xue Qilin didn’t answer.
Lips trembling, eyes shaking, she put her face on Gong Tianqing’s arm full of cuts.
The still not healed wounds exudes a thick smell of blood, which poured into Xue Qilin’s nose and raged inside. She felt like her mouth is also stained with the taste of blood. It was not until she felt a warm moist sensation on her lips, did she realize that she unconsciously broke her lower lip with her bite.
Probably because her heart has become fatigued, a tear silently slid down her face and fell on a wound of Gong Tianqing.
However, no matter how many tears she sheds, Gong Tianqing’s wounds won’t heal, nothing will change.
After a while, Xue Qilin looked up.
She discovered that Gong Tianqing’s face lost its usual rosy color and looks morbidly pale, and even her steps have become unsteady.
On the other hand, she finally realized to whom the Human Realm breath she sensed just a few moments ago belongs to.
It belongs to the man who lies on the floor outside the door — Gong Yue — not Gong Tianqing. Loosing a lot of blood led to Gong Tianqing’s weakened state, where even the circulation of true qi inside her has slowed down a lot. Therefore, Xue Qilin couldn’t sense her breath momentarily.
If it wasn’t for Gong Yue being luckily with Gong Tianqing, Xue Qilin might have misunderstood that Gong Tianqing was not in this small building.
She can’t stay here! This cry echoed in Xue Qilin’s mind.
“Little Qing, come with me. You can’t stay here.”
Xue Qilin’s voice was awfully quiet.
At first glance, there are no ripples in her eyes. But if you take a closer look, you can see the intense, dark emotions roiling in the abyss of her eyes. The turbulent emotions are on the verge of erupting and seem like they will overflow and pour out of the eyes at any time.
If it wasn’t for her remaining rationality, thanks to which she barely contained her emotions, she might have recklessly leveled the Gong Mansion.
Fortunately, the promise she made with Qi Qiqi displayed an effect.
“I’m sorry, Young Ancestor. I can’t go with you.”
Gong Tianqing dodged Xue Qilin hand that tried to grab her. A grief-stricken, unsightly smile appeared on the lass’s face.
Xue Qilin gazed at Gong Tianqing in a daze, her eyes filled with the color of not understanding. As if something hard was stuck in the throat, she couldn’t even ask “why”.
“My brother is dying, and only my blood can save him.”
Then, Gong Tianqing assumed an expression that you would show other when talking about your unshakable believes.
— full of brilliant tenderness.
Even calling it an expression of happiness would not be an exaggeration. Nevertheless, this happiness is surely distorted.
“Young Ancestor, he needs me.”
“… how much blood will be enough?”
She swallowed the thing stuck in her throat with great difficulty. Yet, Xue Qilin’s voice is unexpectedly hoarse, sounding like the noise made by two bones rubbing against one another.
Judging by the wounds on Gong Tianqing’s arm, she should have shed blood for her brother many times already. In other words, her brother’s demand for her blood is likely to persist.
If… if that’s the case —
“If you exhaust your life before you can save him — then what about your brother? Are you ready to give everything for this, even if it includes your life?”
“I am.”
There was no hesitation.
Gong Tianqing nodded readily.
This is beyond sharing burden, it is sacrificing yourself. Xue Qilin was silent for a long time.
“Is it because you feel indebted?”
“It’s not.”
Gong Tianqing shook her head lightly.
“As long as he needs me, I have to answer him.”
As if talking about a lofty ideal, her eyes are full of colors. However, among the many colors, Xue Qilin can’t see colors that truly belong to Gong Tianqing.
Is there an “ego” in her eyes? Xue Qilin feels skeptical.
However, what makes Xue Qilin even more skeptical… what she even questioned, “And your brother? Is he really willing to accept your sacrifice?”
It is really hard to imagine a person with a conscience to readily accept the life of their sister.
Consequently —
“It doesn’t matter.”
Gong Tianqing uttered these three words after a moment of silence.
Originally, Xue Qilin thought that if Gong Tianqing’s brother was really that cold-blooded, she would kill him herself. But now it seems that she may have mistaken something.
Gong Tianqing is not without an ego, but is all about her ego — her ego of sacrificing herself for others.
It is clearly such a noble sentiment, yet how come it’s not acknowledged as such?
Maybe it’s because there’s no corresponding weight.
Xue Qilin is willing to sacrifice herself for the people that are important to her in exchange for their future happiness.
However, behind Gong Tianqing’s sacrifice, there is only the word “needed”. Just from this word, her sacrifice purely serves to satisfy her ego.
People say that love is the most beautiful lie in the world, because the essence of love is selfishness. However, they often neglect the fact that selfishness can be divided into types.
Selfishness can be purely for your own ego, it can be for the people who are important to you, or it can be for an entire nation.
If Gong Tianqing’s sacrifice is only a means of seeking self-worth, then she is really awfully selfish. If she won’t hesitate to seek self-worth by such a method, then her ego must be distorted.
“Otherwise, I’ll be unnecessary.”
Gong Tianqing is lonely and afraid.
She never thought about the happiness or the future of others, she only doesn’t want to be unnecessary. This is the reason why she is willing to sacrifice herself. Her ego is distorted, even disgusting.
If the lass in front of her was not Gong Tianqing, Xue Qilin would have left with a flick of her sleeve already. Regrettably, she is Gong Tianqing, and so Xue Qilin cannot ignore her.
I would really like to scold her and wake her up. This is the only idea left in Xue Qilin’s heart.
However, she knows that she cannot stay here much longer.
I have to take her back first. Xue Qilin thought to herself, and then took action at once.
She silently placed Gong Tianqing over her shoulder. Gong Tianqing was a little stunned at first. When she reacted, she started struggling at once.
“Young, Young Ancestor, put me down! What, what are you doing?”
With Gong Tianqing screaming and kicking in panic, Xue Qilin walked to the bed, and then threw her on the bed.
“I, I’m going to call for help!”
“Go ahead, scream yourself hoarse!”
Xue Qilin slapped Gong Tianqing on the buttocks, then took out the handkerchief that Qi Qiqi forced her to bring and plugged Gong Tianqing’s mouth with it.
“Waah, that felt good.”
Gong Tianqing, in a rare fashion, stared intensely at Xue Qilin. She can only make vague “wu — wu –” sounds. Xue Qilin grimaced at the lass, then wrapped her up with a quilt. She pulled down a bed curtain and tied her up.
Although she tried her best to endure, but the burning anger deep inside her still made Xue Qilin’s action a little rough. Gong Tianqing issued sounds that sounded like cries of pain, and tears emerged at the corners of her eyes.
“Done! Anyhow, it feels quite nice to play the rogue once in a while!”
After wrinkling her nose, Xue Qilin smiled slyly and walked out the door with Gong Tianqing wrapped into “sushi” placed over her shoulder.
As she passed Gong Yue, who has fainted, she snored and kicked him heavily, giving slight vent to the anger that she has been suppressing.
“Oh!”
Gong Yue screamed and sat up reflexively, and then fainted again due to severe pain.
*