"This guy. Now you're back to your usual self. Maybe it were the changes that happened to you these past few days influencing your actions."
She smiled and stood up.
Maybe she's right about this. I shouldn't be this confused. My desire didn't change anyway, it just got a little clearer and with me remembering the emotion of like and love, I was purposely trying to change my image for the better. But that's not me. I'm already at the far end of the spectrum, I couldn't just jump to the other side.
I should just do the usual. I stopped doing the most despicable methods but I shouldn't change the way I approach things. This was what she's talking about, my usual self.
This desire, I have to start controlling it, not be controlled by it. What do I want to do with Nami?
Well, it doesn't need to be asked. Of course, it's to make her mine. Then, I will stick to that thought.
Now that it became clear to me. Let's make this girl fall for me and steal her from Ogawa.
I took the chair and sat on it before I tapped my lap, asking her to sit there.
"Do you want me to sit there?"
Nami asked with her eyebrows raised. She didn't look like she was rejecting the idea, in fact, she was amused.
"Yes? You stood up on purpose so we could do this, right? This is the only way to share this chair."
"I think I was already influenced by you."
She sighed and after a few seconds of hesitation, she sat on my lap. She circled her arm around my neck to support her.
I could feel her soft butt pressing on my thigh.
Ah. I want to cup a feel of it. But yeah, I could already feel its shape from my thigh
"Now we looked like a real couple, Nami."
I smiled at her and she visibly reddened. Maybe for her, this is still an act but she's sharp enough to know that she also wanted this, it doesn't matter whether it's an act or not.
She could deny it but I could clearly feel that she's not against our closeness.
I used my arm to support her by holding her waist.
"Stop talking, pervert. I'll stand up immediately when that door opens, understand?"
"Fine by me. I'm already satisfied enough to hold you like this."
"I'm only fulfilling the deal I made with you. I'm your lover right now, so you should also act like my lover."
I see. This is the same with Satsuki. She will hold onto that acting part. I guess I should be satisfied with this for now. She will fall soon.
"I still don't know how to act as your lover but I'm well-versed at taking care of a girl. Wanna try it?"
I pulled her closer to me with our lips almost touching. We could now smell each other's breath.
"Remember our agreement, Ruu."
She reminded me as she pulled her head back a little.
"Then how about this?"
I took her hand and brought it to my lips. I kissed it while my eyes were stuck staring at her.
She watched me closely doing that.
"I'm impressed. You're really well-versed at taking advantage of a girl."
She said sarcastically with a smirk on her face.
"But, of course."
And I responded to it with the same intent.
My kiss traveled from her hand and to her upper arm. When I was about to kiss her neck, she stopped me by putting a finger on my lips.
"I think that's far enough, Ruu."
"Alright."
I turned away and acted like I'm disappointed. It's not like she didn't like what I did, maybe she was scared that she won't be able to stop me from going further if my kisses reached her neck.
"Hey, Ruu. Do you want to know why I like Kazuo?"
Nami repositioned herself to lean her body to me. I could smell her scent and feel her softness. To have her in my arms like this, this girl already likes me...
She's not naive. To let another guy other than her boyfriend be this close to her, that clearly shows how she feels for me.
She could brush it off as acting in front of them but not when we're alone like this.
Will she let Ogawa be this close to her as well? I don't know but I'm sure I don't want to see that happening before my eyes.
"No. I don't want to hear you talking about another guy. Maybe after this act, but right now, no."
"I forgot, you easily get jealous. You're a possessive man, Ruu."
I couldn't deny that because it's true. This might also be the reason why I also wanted to keep those girls who were still chasing after me back in middle school. Or Nikaido who expressed how she likes me. I'm just too possessive to those who I like and those who like me. Like Himeko said, I'm a greedy and stupid guy.
"Maybe when I successfully stole you from him, I wouldn't mind you mentioning him again."
"Keep dreaming, Ruu. Does this mean we don't have anything to talk about right now?"
She asked while looking around this empty room.
This room was clean enough that we could lie down on the floor if we wanted to.
"We don't really need to talk, passing the time like this with you is already enough to satisfy me."
"Enough to satisfy you, but I get bored easily, Ruu."
She took my hand again not to hold it but to relieve her boredom by tracing the lines on my palm.
"Actually, we can do something more, you know?"
I whispered to her ears before I planted a kiss just below her ears. I ought to do more but I felt her tense as she slowly turned her face to me.
"Ruu, I told you to stop. Even if I'm curious about it, let's not do more, please?"
She pleaded as she pushed my head away.
"Alright, you're my boss this time. Then can we just stay like this?"
I couldn't just end this act without pushing our relationship forward, she's already not against embracing me and sitting on my lap.
I wanted to hold her more closely so I used both of my arms to hug her and pulled her closer to me. She was squirming her body as resistance but yeah, my arms were stronger than her. In the end, she gave up and let her whole body lean onto me.
She looked up and glared at me but I answered her with a contented smile.
She only sent a retaliatory slap to my shoulder to show her displeasure to what I did.
"Actually, tell me more about yourself, Ruu. I want to know how you became like this. Your desire and such. It's something foreign to me."
After a few minutes in that position and silence, Nami spoke first. Her boredom took over her again.
"I seldom talk about myself, Nami. Give me a reason why I should tell you about it."
"Because you like me and this is a chance for you to appeal to me."
To appeal? Will my history even appeal to her? It's like a dark history for me but I'm not regretting any of the things I've done.
"Ah. I don't think it will appeal to you. I'm sure you'll hate me if you learned about my history."
"And that's why I want to know. Ruu, you're not as dense as Kazuo. What we're doing right now and what I'm feeling for you, I know it's all clear to you."
As I thought, Nami was clear about what we're doing. On the surface, it might just be us acting like real lovers only but the feelings she's showing me were all real.
"Nami…"
"So, will you tell me or not?"
This is a crossroad for our relationship. If I don't tell her, my chances to steal her will drop to zero. And if I tell her about it, she will just hate me for everything I did before.
There's that option to lie but I'd rather not tell her than lie to her about my past.
"I don't want to lie to you, Nami. So can you give me time to think about it?"
"I see... I like you, Ruu."
Nami nodded at me as her answer. She then raised her head to whisper in my ears before reaching in and planted a kiss on my cheek.
"Eh?"
I couldn't help but be surprised at what she did and the words she uttered. When she lowered her head again, I saw her biting her lips while her face was beet red.
"Don't be surprised, Ruu. I did that because I'm satisfied with your answer. Tell me when you finished thinking about it. Until then, we can only be like this. Stuck in this stolen time we called 'acting'."
I couldn't respond to her after that. She described what we have right now clearly. This acting was just a stolen time where we could show how we really like each other whether it's in front of her friends or alone like this.
At the end of our act, she will go back to being Ogawa's girl.
Time passed where we just stayed like that. Close but distant. I want to show how much I like her but it will just put her off so I didn't do anything. We only embraced and enjoyed the comfort we brought each other through this connection.
Until I tell her about my past, she won't be able to decide whether she will continue our relationship to take it a step further or not.
Kana and Satsuki seem to have no intention to ask me about my past deeds but I guess it just hasn't come to their minds yet. If they ask me, will I be able to tell them?
I don't have to think about this back in middle school but with all the changes that happened to me these past few days, I guess, one day I have to tell them when they asked.
They're already mine, I won't hesitate to tell them all about it.
Nami is different from them though, she's still not mine and currently, she's Ogawa's girlfriend. This is why I'm having a hard time thinking about it.
When we heard the approaching footsteps, Nami immediately stood up from my lap. She fixed her clothes and asked me to check.
Well, there's nothing wrong with her clothes, I looked down at my lap and it's still a bit numb from how long she was comfortably sitting there.
Our acting for the day is about to end. Will I let it end like this? I still can't decide whether to tell her about what she wanted to know.
I guess I just have to come up with an answer before our next acting session.
When I looked at her back and her expectant gaze towards the door, I couldn't help but feel jealous.
I already felt this before from my previous conquests especially during the time when I was trying to steal Haruko. Most of the time, she will be with the Vice President and I couldn't do anything but wait for my chance. I never called it being jealous though. I interpreted it as something else.
I stood up next to her and like what she did earlier, I kissed her cheek.
When she felt that, she turned her gaze to me like asking for an answer to why I did it.
Ah. I don't want our act to end it like this. What we did wasn't enough for me.
I pulled her to another hug and raised her face just enough that our lips were only centimeters apart.
This act of ours is about to end. I want to make it memorable for us.
Is she also thinking what I'm thinking?
I looked at her eyes, searching for the answer to the question I asked to myself.
A few seconds later, Nami nodded and closed her eyes.
This girl, she really knew what I wanted to do. And by closing her eyes, she had just given me her consent.
To end this in a memorable note, I closed the few centimeters of distance between our lips.
It was just a quick kiss but the seconds when our lips touched felt more than just that few seconds.
Nami was blushing and smiling when our lips separated. She didn't utter a single word after opening her eyes and just turned back to face the door.
Soon enough, the door to the clubroom opened.
With this, our first act ended.
