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Memoirs of the Returneechapter 147: fragment (3)

Fragment (3)

Rustle… Rustle…

Rustle… Rustle…

Like snow falling, each day piles up within me.

The days spent with Elise color me white.

I can hardly recall the past now.

Could it be an overload of the 「Notepad」?

The boundless times seem to swallow me whole.

Thanks to that, I’m forgetting too many things, but it’s something I’ve already prepared for. It’s a resolution I made long ago.

I have enough energy to focus on the present.

Still…

Still, I have time.

Rustle-

I turned the page of the book.

It’s a new novel written by Elise herself. The title is [A Short Story That Wishes to Be a Novel]. It’s a mystery thriller with romance.

It’s too interesting for something prepared for just one person, but Elise never does anything half-heartedly.

Thump-!

Just then, the door to the greenhouse opened.

There’s no need to check who it is. After all, there are only two of us in this world.

“…What?”

Elise.

But today, she was soaked from the rain.

“Why are you wet from the rain?”

I picked up a towel and placed it on her head. I wiped the moisture from her hair as if I was washing it. Rub rub rub rub-

“Hey, wait. I’ll, I’ll do it. You’re going to scrape my scalp off.”

Elise awkwardly snatched the towel. As she wiped herself dry, she saw the book in my hand. A bitter smile spread on her lips.

“…Did you enjoy reading it?”

I nodded my head.

“Yeah. It’s interesting. How was the exploration?”

When I casually asked, Elise’s expression hardened.

I had seen that look before.

Suddenly, a ‘past’ that I had buried deep in my heart came back to life.

“Elise?”

“…Later.”

She took out manuscript paper and a pencil. It seemed like she was about to start writing another new work.

I quietly watched her and sat down on the sofa.

“Hey.”

I called Elise. She pretended not to hear and just scribbled with her pencil at the desk.

“Elise.”

Only then did she reluctantly glance at me.

“Come here.”

I patted the seat next to me. Elise bit her lip without a word.

“Hurry up.”

When I urged her again, she sighed, got up from her seat, and came to sit next to me.

“Do you realize? It’s already been 600 days.”

I poked her sullen face.

“Adding a few tens or hundreds of days here doesn’t make any difference.”

Adding a few hundred days to the tens of thousands of days we’ve walked through doesn’t change anything.

“It’s okay if we’re a little late.”

Because I, perhaps.

Because I like the Elise of now.

“…Haah.”

Then she let out a faint breath. Holding my arm, she quietly looked up at me. Her large eyes trembled faintly.

“Actually… I’ve reached the exit.”

I looked at her as she said that. She couldn’t even dare to look me in the eye.

What is she afraid of?

“But, I don’t think I can leave.”

She’s good at lying. She’s familiar with acting. Of course, she’s not as good as me.

Because… did we do a play together before? Was I a Duke?

My memory is vague, but I’m sure she’s lying.

“Why?”

I asked calmly.

“From the beginning, the exit was closed. So… I think we need to find another exit. As you said, we need… more time.”

“Hmm. I see.”

I nodded and smiled faintly. Elise glanced at me sideways.

“Are you… okay?”

She was scared. Afraid that I might blame her. That I might be disappointed.

“Of course, I’m okay. You’ve been through a lot.”

I stroked Elise’s head. She quietly nestled in my arms. The thumping of her heart echoed.

She spoke in a trembling voice soaked with emotion.

“…I’m sorry.”

* * *

Ascal Calendar, December 25th.

The calendar they had created together had completed two cycles, and it was probably more than 1,000 days since Elise became aware of her regression.

“Hey Elise. Look.”

Shion woke Elise, who was sleeping in the hammock.

“…?”

Elise looked at him with a face full of sleepiness.

“According to our calendar, today is Christmas. So.”

Snap- He flicked his finger. Snowflakes began to appear on the ceiling of the farm.

“…?”

While Elise was staring blankly, those white circles began to twinkle like light bulbs and slowly… started to descend.

It was snowing.

The entire greenhouse was covered with snowflakes.

Elise quietly observed the scene.

Crunch── Crunch──.

The accumulating snow was beautiful.

The gradually whitening floor was fascinating.

He, standing in the middle of it all, smiling at her, was beautiful.

“How… How did you do it? What’s the medium?”

There isn’t much mana in the world within the [Fragment].

Therefore, to make artificial snow fall to this extent, a ‘medium’ that helps efficiently circulate the magic power would be essential.

“This.”

Shion held up a white 「card」. Elise giggled.

“What’s that?”

“I don’t know exactly. It was stuck in the greenhouse sign when we came. But.”

He shrugged his shoulders. As if it didn’t matter what this card was.

“How is it? It’s my Christmas gift.”

“What are you asking? Of course, I love it.”

Elise answered. She pulled Shion’s arm, making him embrace her from behind.

In that position, they faced the falling snow.

Shion said.

“Today’s menu is sirloin steak.”

“…Hey. I know I’m the one eating, but you’ve been making sirloin steak almost every day for a month.”

“Really?”

“What do you mean really? Do you enjoy teasing me?”

“Of course.”

Shion pinched her cheek. Elise puffed her cheek in response, playfully obstructing him.

* * *

…That night.

While waiting for the world’s regeneration, which was still four hours away, they lay down together to sleep. At some point.

Boom──!

A vibration occurred in the space. Elise jolted. She quickly got up and opened the door of the farm.

“…?”

Her eyes widened as she looked beyond.

“What is… this?”

The distant horizon.

The land and sky there, were disappearing.

As if wiped clean with an eraser, it disappeared without a trace.

The world of [Fragment]… is vanishing.

Thud-

Approaching footsteps.

Shion.

Elise looked up at him. His face was dark, but he didn’t seem as flustered as she was.

“It seems to have started.”

He sounded resigned, as if he had already anticipated it.

“Shion. Why, why is this happening? We still have a lot of time left for regeneration.”

When she asked, he looked down at her.

“…I told you before. This [Fragment] only has a day’s worth of energy.”

He spoke in a deep tone.

“The [Origin of the Fragment] is the same. The more memory accumulates in you, the longer you remember, the more the Origin can’t bear the weight of your magnetism.”

To use a magnet as a metaphor, Elise’s magnetism has become stronger than the [Origin of the Fragment].

Thus, instead of the Origin and Elise maintaining balance and being ‘anchored’ to each other,

Elise ends up pulling the Origin towards her.

“The Fragment will break before you do. It can hold on for now, but not much longer.”

“……”

Elise bowed her head.

Now, in Shion’s voice, there was a faint hint of sorrow.

An attitude that seemed to see through the whole phenomenon.

From that, she naturally knew.

Being with him for over a thousand days, she had no choice but to know.

“……Shion.”

Elise dropped her eyes to the ground. She didn’t have the courage to look up at his face.

“I’m not the first, am I.”

“……”

Shion slightly closed his eyes.

Soon, he gritted his teeth and opened them again.

“Yes. You’re right.”

The one who first became aware of the regression,

Was not the current Elise.

Even these days that exceeded a thousand—were ultimately the wheel of regression.

“The previous you struggled to endure.”

Elise gathered her courage and raised her head. She looked at Shion.

“When the [Fragment] itself is erased, all your memory disappears. That in itself is no different from death to you.”

In front of Shion’s eyes, some afterimage flickers.

“Elise, you……”

The ceiling of the greenhouse.

In the place where we stayed together, having let go of everything,

“I killed you.”

Elise, who hanged herself.

……Whoosh.

A void wind blows in from the edge of the [Fragment].

“……Why.”

She asked blankly.

“Why didn’t you tell me.”

At that moment, Shion’s expression changed drastically.

“If I had told you.”

His face turned cold. His eyes sharpened.

“You wouldn’t have looked for an exit.”

Even his voice was dyed with coldness.

“You wouldn’t have tried to escape from here.”

“……Stop-”

Elise tried to stop his mouth, but──

“How long!”

──Shion spat out words that were too harsh.

“……Do I have to be here? Because of you.”

A word that pierced like a dagger.

Elise’s chest trembled greatly.

It felt as if the ground beneath her feet had collapsed.

It felt as if her heart had been torn apart.

“Because of… me.”

She tried hard to keep her face from crying. It didn’t work well and quickly distorted. In the end, she turned around because she didn’t want to show it.

“Elise.”

“……”

Shion called out to her, but she ignored him.

She walked away.

The rain started to fall again.

She trudged through the pouring rain, staggering weakly.

Shion didn’t stop her. He watched her retreating figure for a long time.

Instead, as she disappeared into the distance…

He murmured softly, staring into the dark beyond.

“…I’m sorry.”

It might sound like an excuse, but it can’t be helped.

This story shouldn’t unfold the same way again.

Because then, you would die again.

I hope you can escape from here while still being yourself.

I hope you don’t die.

I feel like it’s already too late, but that’s why, more than ever.

I hope you can keep living.

Shion turned around. He opened the door to the greenhouse.

The Ascal farm, where it was still snowing.

There, now alone.

He opened the book Elise had written.

[A Short Story That Wishes to Be a Novel].

He read the single volume as one day passed, then two, then three…

Even after ten days.

She did not return.

* * *

In the pouring rain, Elise was staring at the river. She had been sleeping and staying here for ten days, without eating anything.

Her bloodshot eyes were still filled with sorrow.

But no more tears came out. They had flowed and flowed until it felt like blood would come out next.

“…Cookie.”

She looked at Cookie beside her.

“I must have been mistaken.”

She thought he enjoyed being with her in here.

But that wasn’t the case.

Because she has to leave this place for him to be able to go.

Because she has to open the exit for him to be able to get away from her.

“I guess you were just accommodating me.”

There’s no helping it. If he’s been accommodating her for a thousand days, she has to admit it.

No, at some point, he must have had some feelings for her. But she guesses he lost interest because she hid the exit.

“I would probably do the same if I were you.”

Elise rationalized it and got up. She wiped her swollen eyes.

And then, the river that led to the ‘exit’.

She stepped onto the stepping stones.

“…Huh.”

The stones she had anchored with her magnetism, one step at a time.

She walked with Cookie.

Whether she lives or dies, he probably doesn’t care, but still.

Because he can only leave if she opens this exit.

For him, who is trapped because of her, to give him what he wants.

“…”

Elise clenched her fists and hopped.

She crossed the stepping stones, enduring the rocking waves, taking the rainstorm head-on.

She almost fell in the middle but barely managed to keep her balance. It would be a waste to die now.

…Anyway.

She crossed the riverbank, which she really didn’t want to cross, faster than she thought.

“There’s a cave.”

On the other side was the exit—a cave.

What could be at the end?

Her pre-regression self probably never went in.

Elise was scared.

If her memory disappears as soon as she steps in, if her magnetism is dismantled, that would be her death.

Her end…

“Sigh.”

She took a deep breath. She forced herself to be brave.

“I’ll make sure you get out.”

Even if the world is so shitty.

Even if it was a love that belonged to me alone, it was vast.

So vast that it had grown over a thousand days.

Elise stepped into the cave.

Step-

An echo resonated in the hollow.

One step, two steps, three steps.

In her mind, it was a path leading to her own death.

But then…

She suddenly discovered something.

The vast ceiling of the cave. Or the crystals hanging on the walls.

From those hardened stalactites, a certain ‘day’ spreads.

─Today’s menu is potato soup.

The image and voice of Shion offering her food.

On the stalactite right next to it, the same.

─Today’s menu is black bean noodles with steamed buns, do you know what that is?

It was Shion.

Shion Ascal.

From all around, Shion Ascal suddenly bloomed brightly.

Like the stage lights that surge for a moment, distantly……

─Today’s menu is salmon steak. Try some.

“…….”

Elise looked around the interior with stunned eyes.

These were days.

Crystals formed from days that couldn’t be discharged from the [Fragment] and accumulated.

─Today’s menu is……

Day.

Day.

Day.

In those infinite days, Shion was always there.

─I don’t want to die.

And, there was another version of herself.

─I don’t want to die…… Shion.

In the slowly fading [Fragment], herself crying in Shion’s arms.

─…… It’s okay. Let’s stay together, even if it’s just for the remaining time.

Shion comforted her with those words, but not long after.

She hanged herself and died.

A thoughtless, overly irresponsible choice to leave Shion alone.

Elise stepped forward, observing those pasts.

Tears that seemed to have dried up flowed again. Their trails were etched on the cave floor like footprints.

There were days even on the ground where her tears fell.

─Hey. Why are you so bad at billiards? Try to play better. It’s not fun.

The entire cave was filled with moments.

All of these were days that Shion had to bear alone.

─…… You’re pretty good at ping pong. I admit.

It wasn’t just a thousand days.

It wasn’t just ten thousand days.

A time too burdensome for a human to maintain their existence……

He had endured all of that.

Just for someone like me.

“……Ah.”

Elise knelt down. Something surged inside her.

It was a pain as if her soul was burning, gratitude, and sorrow.

“Why…….”

But, she realized too late.

That he no longer had any time left.

Even if she crossed the passage and opened the exit, Shion couldn’t go back to before.

He, who had been buried in so much time……

Could never be Shion again.

“Like a fool…….”

That would be another form of death.

He had protected her while accepting all of that.

She was just like a child……

As the weight of it all became too much to bear, she pressed her forehead to the ground.

“……!”

Suddenly, her eyes opened wide.

Mana filled her tear-filled eyes.

Burning her brain─some kind of realization ignited.

The genius intuition that overturns the gaps of this [Fragment] and finds the least probable solution.

In her head, the branches of activated thoughts spread at super speed, formulating an excellent hypothesis, verifying it, and deriving a perfect possibility.

“Card.”

The medium Shion used to make it snow.

“Medium.”

It might be possible with that.

Elise hastily got up. Wiping her flowing tears, she ran.

Again, to him……

* * *

…Elise returned to the greenhouse.

Shion was still there in the place where it was still snowing.

“Hey, Shion!”

She shouted loudly and opened the door.

“Oh, you surprised me.”

He, who was reading a book, looked back at her. A bunch of worry and surprise bloomed on his face.

“Why are you here-”

“Shion!”

She covered his mouth. She approached him confidently, lightly slapped his cheek, and looked up at him.

“I promise.”

“…Promise?”

“Yes, promise.”

She glanced at the floor. That ‘card’ was there. The medium for making artificial snow.

Elise nodded her head with overflowing confidence.

“I will never die like that Elise.”

“…What?”

She said with a deliberately bright smile.

“Absolutely. I will not lose my memory.”

“…”

To Shion, who was staring at her blankly, Elise still had something to say. There was a promise she wanted to make.

“And……”

I will erase your memory.

I will erase all the memory of being with me.

So you can go back to your time,

And live as the proper Shion.

Not the Shion who is buried in ‘too many days’ like now.

So you can live as the Shion I’ve always seen, and will see in the future.

From you……

I will erase ‘me’.

“No.”

But, if I spill that promise, you might refuse.

Elise changed her words with a small smile.

“I need you to hold on. Until I can get out of here alive with this memory.”

Shion was silent for a moment, but soon responded with his trademark smile.

“As long as it takes.”

And now we have finally caught up with the raws. Well, there is still one more chapter available, but starting from tomorrow, only 1 chapter will be released per day, with a max of 5 per week. Keep in mind, that I am EXTREMELY lazy, so the schedule is not set in stone.