༺ The Lord Is With Us (38) ༻
That night, Delphine had a nightmare.
Memories of Old Man Hanson’s execution and her moments of suffering under Ian’s blade tangled together to form a jumbled mess that weighed heavily on her chest.
The memory of her begging on her knees, her father’s crimson eyes filled with contempt, and the golden eyes of the only man she had tasted defeat from-
Images of the old man bleeding on the ground and her own bloodied body collapsed on the ground, her throat raspy from all the anguished screams she let out, overlapped together.
She was once again submerged in a sense of powerlessness.
The guilt of not being able to rescue Old Man Hanson from the brink of death overwhelmed her as her breaths became more ragged. Fumbling around, Delphine soon found her sword.
I deserve to be punished.
It was possible that they might face a demonic human tomorrow. As such, she was an indispensable force to the group.
But what if she broke down again after seeing Ian’s hatchet?
What if she fails again?
No. She couldn’t fail. She couldn’t afford to lose ever again.
Delphine lightly cut her arm with her sword in the same way Ian had cut her before. Blood slowly seeped from the cut, but her anxiety remained.
Her anxiety grew, and she soon threw on her coat and searched for Ian with frantic steps.
Before long, she found Ian meditating in an empty area.
Normally, it was basic etiquette not to disturb a meditating swordsman. However, in her desperation, she didn’t have the leisure to be considerate of every little thing.
Hadn’t it already been proven that losing only led to misery?
She ended up losing Old Man Hanson and even had to get on her knees and kiss the foot of the man, who coldly told her that even death was a luxury for her.
She didn’t want to lose again.
Yet at the same time, it made her want to lose more.
It was a contradictory emotion that she couldn’t make sense of.
She had already gone mad. Deep down, she even thought that she desired a merciful and compassionate victor.
Ian was such a victor, and she felt there was value in losing to him. Rather, she would even go as far as to say that it was good that she had lost to him. The defeat he handed her and the punishment he dealt her provided her with a sense of relief.
She felt joy in knowing that she was the one receiving punishment instead of someone precious to her.
That was why she implored him. She was confident that, as long as he punished her today, she wouldn’t fumble tomorrow.
“Please… Punish me….”
Ian, who was taken aback by her sudden presence, immediately stiffened upon hearing her plea. He carefully looked at her before soon shaking his head with a sigh.
“Senior Delphine, what are you……”
“Punish me!”
However, faced with his imminent refusal, Delphine became more adamant.
With a pitiful look in her eyes, she kneeled on the ground.
“N-no… P-please punish me. Is this how I should say it? A-and a-aren’t I useful? D-don’t you have to make use of me tomorrow…? That’s why… please punish me…….”
Ian averted his gaze with a grave expression as distress washed over him.
But when he saw Delphine about to bow and slam her head against the floor, he let out a deep sigh and stood up.
Then, Delphine suddenly felt a heavy blow knock the air out of her lungs as she was sent rolling across the ground.
He had firmly kicked her in the stomach.
She involuntarily curled up into a ball and groaned. The kick felt more painful than she had anticipated since she didn’t soften the blow with her mana.
Seeing her in pain, Ian hurriedly ran over and lightly tapped her cheeks.
“Senior Delphine, Senior Delphine! Are you okay? I tried to simulate shock therapy but…”
“Ugh... I-I’m okay…….”
She managed to answer between gasps of air with a hazy look.
Once the suffocating pain passed, her mind began to clear. It felt cool and refreshing, and the pain lingering in the pit of her stomach felt like a drop of ice-cold water in a hot, dry desert.
She felt good.
The subtle sense of exhaustion and relief relaxed her tense muscles.
It was only after a few minutes that she came back to her senses and avoided Ian’s puzzled gaze with flushed cheeks.
Delphine cleared her throat with a dry cough in a feeble attempt to regain her composure.
The man cautiously opened his mouth to speak.
“…Why did you do that?”
“F-forget about it.”
Delphine tried to speak to him like nothing was wrong, but she couldn’t hide her trembling voice.
His emotions were written all over his awkwardly smiling face. He was dumbfounded. Seeing him like that made her feel even more embarrassed, and she lowered her gaze to the ground.
Her face had been burning red for a while now. Delphine had barely blushed throughout her entire life, but right now, it wouldn’t have been surprising if steam was rising off her forehead.
The fact that Delphine asked her junior to punish her made her heart tickle with an emotion that was beyond shame.
Then, Ian followed up with a second question..
“…Why are you so obsessed with winning?”
She held her breath for a moment.
Delphine was unable to respond without telling him the truth about her nightmare, so she remained silent.
She had already grown up too much to recall the memory of that day. The heir of the Yurdina family wasn’t someone who could show any signs of weakness.
Even though it seemed like she already showed Ian the weakest she could ever be, she used her only choice left to save face. Her right to remain silent.
The man sighed, as if he knew that his senior would choose to stay quiet.
“If you’re feeling uneasy, let’s make a bet.”
“……A bet?”
His proposal came out of nowhere. She kept silent so that he could finish, knowing that she’d been the one to impose on him all of sudden.
“Yes, just listen to what I have to say this one time. I’ll help you win.”
“…A hundred percent chance of winning?”
“A hundred percent, immediately.”
Delphine went silent. Frankly, she thought it was an unfair bet for herself.
If she listened to Ian’s words so that she could win, it was the same thing as losing the bet she would make with him. It was a lose-lose situation for her.
However, she thought it was probably the same thing as Ian threatening her with a hatchet or issuing an order to her under the pretext of a bet. She pressed her lips together, as if deep in thought.
After a while, Delphine opened her mouth..
“…Alright. But how do I distinguish between that command and other instructions? And what’s on the line for the bet?”
“I’ll call you ‘Delphine Yurdina’ instead of Senior Delphine. If I win, you have to continue listening to me.”
That was it. He kept his mouth shut after he said that, almost like he didn’t even consider the option of him losing to her.
It was quite funny. Delphine laughed dryly as if it were ridiculous, but she inwardly thought to herself.
That the man standing in front of her was a little bit reliable.
It was different from the emotion she felt when dealing with her subordinates or her colleagues. Delphine still couldn’t put a finger on the emotion that she was feeling. However, it was clear that her perception of Ian changed right at that moment.
In a more positive way than it had been before.
While she was reconsidering what she thought about Ian, he quickly opened his mouth presumably coming to a sudden realization.
“By the way, do you have a healing potion?”
Delphine’s puzzled eyes turned to face him. Ian continued to speak with a smile.
“Give me one. I think the one that you gave me before was defective.”
Delphine, who was silent for a while, soon started speaking to him in a soft, scolding tone. Her voice was mixed with a sigh.
“Hatchet Lord, it seems like you’re not aware but it’s impossible to have defective healing poti-”
“You have a lot of it anyway.”
Delphine went silent again. Her bewildered eyes turned to Ian.
He was still smiling.
In the end, she couldn’t argue against him any longer. She reluctantly took out a healing potion and handed it over.
Ian grumbled even as he received Delphine’s share of the healing potions.
Wealthy people were able to carry large amounts of healing potions in containers enchanted with space expansion magic. When they needed to use a healing potion, all they had to do was divide it into individual potion bottles.
But since he’d accidentally left his potion bottle in the forest last time, there were no extra bottles to store the healing potion. He had no choice but to store the brew temporarily in a small bottle.
The potion bottle was surprisingly expensive since it was reinforced to not break during battle. It was also inconvenient to carry in large quantities, so most people only carried a few irregardless of how many they had or could afford.
Ian, who was fully aware of that, continued to prod at Delphine to get her more and more annoyed.
“It looks like it would break if I just rolled on the ground once… Oh man, oh man.”
Delphine’s body shook in anger from getting her healing potion practically stolen from her, but that was just about all she could do in protest.
Even as she thought about glaring at Ian, she knew that she would quickly become intimidated soon after making eye-contact with his golden eyes.
Each time she acknowledged her fear of him, she realized the reality of the situation. The fact that she could no longer resist or fight against the man in front of her.
This was the reason why she would never know.
That Ian’s attitude, in fact, was a way for him to express that he was considering Delphine’s feelings.
It was a shallow calculated thought that she would maybe regain her self-esteem after he lowered himself to her through a little bit of bickering.
Of course, none of it would work with how impossible the prospect was of her rebelling against him.
Even so, an idea had been planted into her heart without her noticing.
Being punished felt good. Even more so if Ian was the one punishing her.
It was a major turning point in Delphine Yurdina’s life.
***
Come the next day, I stood with my teammates by the entrance to the forest clearing.
Before us, an unknown cave loomed eerily above.
