"I know this is an odd request, but please, teacher, master, sensei, show me your ways of getting a girlfriend." The protagonist stands straight from his seat and bows down to me, who have no clue what he is saying.
"What am I supposed to teach you when I am just as clueless as you are?"
However, despite my effort to let him down, Han still seems determined.
"No, I believe you must be doing something right. I don't think it was pure luck that you got confessed by Laura. C, please hear me out. You are so unknowingly good that you could get into a relationship without lifting a finger! And I would love to learn your way!"
NO!! That is not how it works! That is not how any of this works!
You have to earn it, man! Do not expect girls to come at you like butterflies toward flowers. If you do not work toward your goals, how are they supposed to like you?
Sitting around and waiting for love does not help you at all!
Wait...who am I to say these things? He literally got many girlfriends without doing much. Han should be learning from himself, not me.
...
This is ridiculous.
However...
I can give him hints regarding the girls, right?
Yeah! Now we are talking! That will make the girls swoon over him much easier!!
"As I said, Han, I have nothing to teach you."
"Please! Master!"
"However, as someone who stands outside of everything, I can give you my point of view."
"Really!?" Han jumps up from his position. "Will you really give me your opinion?"
I nod.
"Yeah. But really, man, don't expect much from me. I am most definitely not some love guru. Heck, I have never been in a relationship until today."
"Really? Are you sure?" He looks at me with doubt in his eyes.
Yes, you annoying protagonist.
Why do I have to lie about being a Forever Alone guy?! Do I really have to show you my virgin license?! And why can I be not sure about my relationship status?
Questions like that will get you killed, Han...I would love to punch you in the face just for that. Imagine talking like that to the girls.
They are going to behead you and put it in a jar.
"I am 100 percent sure I have never been noticed by anyone."
That sentence alone is enough to make a grown man cry.
By a grown man, I mean me.
...
Get back in there, tears...
"Well, brother," Han pats me on the shoulder while wiping a tear off his eye. "We are very similar in that regard."
Then he smiles handsomely.
Seriously, I want to smack him in the face.
You know nothing about me, you horny mutt.
"Actually, you know what, let's get started right away with the advice."
Steeling my nerve to see the fear on his face, I suggest. Do you want to have a girlfriend? I will show you the way, you damn bastard.
"WHOA??! Right now?!!"
"Yes."
"Okay! Okay! Let me sit down and try to remember everything clearly." He pulls the chair out and sits diligently.
*Ehem*
Excuse me while I mentally prepare myself as a teacher.
"This morning, I heard Kurokawa say something interesting about love."
"Did she? I don't really remember."
What do you remember, then? She was literally talking to you.
"She said look no further than your line of sight." I am trying my hardest here to keep my voice from bursting out.
"Oh! That! Yes, I do remember her saying something along those lines."
He then ponders for a second.
"Hmm. Kurokawa sure likes to talk a little bit poetic. That sentence is a little vague, isn't it? Line of sight can be very far or near."
Oh, god...the density of this guy's brain should have its own gravitational force...
*Sigh*
Unknowingly, a deep sigh escapes my chest.
"Let me put it in another way for you."
I did not expect this level of support right off the bat like this.
"Please do." He says.
"What do you think of Rachel?"
Rather than going around the bush, I will pinpoint what should be happening for him. It should more or less have an effect, right?
Right...
"Rachel? She is my childhood friend. I appreciate her a lot for what she has done for me."
Appreciate? That is not nearly enough, pal. She has done more for you than you will ever notice with your smooth brain. What have you done to show your appreciation?
"How long has she been by your side?"
"Many years. So long I can't really remember anymore."
It has been since kindergarten that Rachel has been with you. You guys are all 18 by now. That is more than a decade.
I know you are like this because of the system, and I hope you can change that from now on, Han.
Seriously. With Rachel, Kurokawa, and Laura, everyone being entirely different, they have a better chance than ever to achieve their happy endings.
Just...pay a little more attention. Everyone needs it so desperately.
Even you, Han.
"If it has been that long already, have you ever thought about her being interested in you? You guys technically live under the same roof. That has to mean something."
"No way." Han shakes his head from left to right. "She is just being nice."
Cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry, helping you up every morning, and taking care of your needs are not just being nice.
She is like your own MOM!
God! He is making me furious! Do you want my opinion or not?!
*Suuuuuuhaaaaaa*
Keep it together, C.
Trying to keep your cool.
"From my point of view, it does not look like that. To me, Rachel seems to be very interested in you. Why don't you start there?"
"Whah? For real? You think she has feelings for me?" The protagonist points the finger at his face.
"I believe so. Maybe your childhood friend's feelings for you are much bigger and grander than you currently think. After all, do you seriously think a normal childhood friend would devote her all to making you feel satisfied and happy?"
Han leans back on his chair and looks up at the ceiling.
"Makes sense...Thanks, C. But I still can't really believe it. Is it just a kind gesture, or is it really a romantic feeling from Rachel?"
Something is getting through his thick skull finally! I need to keep on pressing. One day, he will see it. I have high hopes for this.
"You are making the wrong assumptions here."
He looks back at me.
"What do you mean?"
"Why can't a kind gesture and love be from the same person? There is no need to separate them now, isn't it? Rachel can be doing all these things because she has feelings for you. Even if she does not love you, the feelings are much on the positive side."
His mouth is wide open at this point, so much so that he can not even reply to my words.
"Laura told me something when she confessed, too."
"What was it?"
"You don't need to know about it. Just think of it like this. When dating someone, it does not need to be based on the premise of love. As long as you would like to understand the other party better, you can become a couple."
He nods constantly.
"Of course! Of course! We're still young! We can experiment!"
*Sigh*
Some progress at last.
But as I am about to continue, Han waves his hand to stop me.
"Wait! Let's talk in whispers. The girls may hear us!" The guy suddenly keeps his voice down upon seeing something in his peripheral.
*Tan*
After his panic, a dish full of peeled fruits is presented in front of the two of us.
"What are you two talking about?" Laura returns from the cooking area. Behind her are Rachel and Kurokawa. She puts a glass of water near me and sits down. The other two also choose a place to sit.
Han's childhood friend does not look happy. I wonder why? However, I think there is a smirk on Kurokawa's lips?
"Nothing!" Han instantly hides everything.
That is not a good move. It only makes things more suspicious.
"We are talking about his love life." I point my finger at him.
"Oh?" Rachel speaks up.
Of course, she would. Out of everyone available here, she would have the highest chance to react to that.
"What have you guys been talking about?"
Her gaze is piercing both of us. The aquamarine color of her eyes is dark and very concerning. If looks could have a physical form, I would be impaled by now.
"Nothing! I swear! Nothing at all! C, we have not been saying anything weird, right? Haha! Right!?"
Cold sweats start to form all over his face.
I turn at him with a big smile, and he returns the gesture. He should be thinking that I am on his team.
That would be totally wrong.
"We have not done anything weird, for sure,"
"See, haha!" Han laughs wryly.
"We have only discussed the future between you and Han."
(You can now buy me milk for me to make more cheese!!!