I sincerely apologized to Igelto, knowing that no excuse would work.
All I could do was acknowledge my mistake. I’m not going to make a cowardly excuse that covers me.
“I was quite adamant that you were going to make it in time—I wondered what great ability you had. I was sure he would save me from that place.”
“………”
“But no matter how long I waited, you wouldn’t come.”
Ah, I see; I was unknowingly worried about my safety, so I had designed the operation in a way that would not run into Hypron, who was dangerous.
“I regret that I believed in humans.”
“……”
“I was also on the verge of death. The fire covered my body.”
“Are you alright?”
“I’m fine now, but I wasn’t fine then.”
At the thought of that time, I remembered Igelto trembling in my arms. Igelto, who felt that pain was alive—the fact at that time had comforted my nerves.
I don’t know if I could or if I deserved to— but I approached him.
He was much bigger than me with a broad back, but at this moment, it looked small.
Everyone wants to be strong in front of fear, but everyone is dwarfed in front of fear. It’s fear that makes us unable to stand out.
“I thought if it was going to be like this—I wanted to just die— but here I am… somehow I’m still alive.
“Isn’t it pretty funny?”
“It’s not funny.”
“What’s funnier is that when I realized that I was passing out and I could live, I felt so much relief—like I wanted to live.”
“………”
“I wanted to live.”
“…yes.”
“I wanted to live—it’s insane.”
He repeated himself, and I nodded quietly.
It may have seemed like a light act, but it was heavy to me.
Here was an existential dilemma I had also struggled with.
I also asked myself, ‘Do I really want to live?’
And I asked another question about the answer I found.
I am not particularly obsessed with life.
So, if Alastair wanted to kill me, I would be willing to die in his hands.
It was sincere.
So far, there is no reversal of this answer.
“But when I thought I wanted to live, a madman rushed to kill me.”
Igelto remembering the masked man.
“It was very painful. I was really sorry to die this time. I wanted to live, but I was on the verge of dying again.”
“……It must have been like a prank from God.”
“No. It’s not God who saved me-you did. Your bracelet saved my life. It’s not God, it’s your prank.”
“I’m sorry.”
I had nothing to say here, even if he was venting out on me.
I waited quietly for his ire; all I could do now was wait.
But unlike what I thought, he smiled faintly as if it was funny.
“Thank you.”
“Uh······?”
When I asked, doubting my ears, Igelto nodded his head timidly.
“I told you. I really wanted to live.”
“…….”
“And you saved my life.”
Where did it come from? An unknown light lit in his green eyes.
It was as if the snow, which had sunk in and melted a little darkly, cleared up a little. It wasn’t obvious, but it was clearer.
“Your prank or whatever. As a result of it, I survived, and you saved me.
“…..”
“As you said, I wouldn’t have gotten out of there if it weren’t for you. It might have been something I had to do to get out of there.”
Is this a characteristic of the Elf race, or is it just Igelto?
He didn’t blame me at all. In fact, his thank-you was sincere.
He thanked me for his ability to escape.
I didn’t show up even as he was on the verge of death.
I thought you would be furious. At least I knew you would see me with resentful eyes. But now. His eyes are clear.
With a smile, Igelto looked slowly around him. It seems that he came out of the space where he was held in prison, and he slightly relaxed.
My lips were naturally drawing lines of a small smile by that little relaxation being spread to me.
“By the way, Serina….”
Only
“Huh?”
“Why is my face like this?”
His eyes had been on me for some time, and turned to the mirror on the wall.
He looked at me with a stony face.
His face was speaking like this: Come on, what’s your excuse.