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After we spent the entire night eating out with friends, laughing, and enjoying life slowly, we came back to Oro's castle and we spent some time watching the stars. Over time everyone went to sleep and Elfina and I stayed looking at the night sky.
Although she had been enjoying herself, I still felt like there was something my Summoner was hiding from us, a slight… pain she felt. It wasn't physical, but perhaps there was something painful in her heart, something bothering her which she didn't really wanted to tell us about, maybe because she didn't wanted to bother us.
Despite how selfish and annoying she started as, Elfina had grown up a lot since she summoned me and has become someone responsible and even self-sacrificing for others. It is pretty obvious she's hiding something, and it is worrying me a bit.
Mostly because I feel that I may soon depart, and I don't want to leave unresolved problems here.
"So?" I asked. "Are you going to tell me what's bothering you, Elfina?"
"O-Oh…" Elfina was a bit surprised. "Was it too obvious?"
"I think the others had a similar idea." I sighed.
"Ah… well…" Elfina sighed, sitting over a chair. "It's just that… I feel a bit bad about everything I did. I apologized yet… I was forgiven so fast. It feels like I wasn't punished for what I did, I feel guilty."
"Well, why would we want to punish you for that?" I asked her. "You got lost when that Desert King attacked us, and then was captured by the Genie. He used his powers to force you to go against us."
"Yeah but… there's something more to it." Elfina sighed. "At first he was unable to do it normally, I resisted but… When he attacked the depths of my mind and my fears…"
"Your mind and fears?" I wondered.
"I… I was forced to face my sins." Elfina said. "Unlike you, or mostly everybody else, I couldn't accept them and move on. I was a coward, and I denied them as my fault. I denied being part of the death of so many people and blamed it all to you… and everyone else. In that moment of weakness, the darkness finally took advantage of it and absorbed me."
This was… not how I expected the Genie's magic to work.
"What… did you saw?" I wondered.
"I… saw many dead people. I saw hundreds- no, thousands. Mostly all the humans we've killed. I saw the Human Emperor, and even the Demon Lords." Elfina cried. "They were there, blaming me for their death. They said I was a monster, and that I did all of that to step on them, to selfishly move onwards to my own path. That by using a pile of corpses, I'll one day accomplish a dream I had…"
"…" I felt slightly surprised. "I guess… I am one to blame for that. Sorry, Elfina. I did the things I did because I've lived my whole life doing it. You're not in the wrong for feeling afraid, or guilty. Maybe I am the weird one here. I just don't know anything better than killing and fighting to protect what I care for. Maybe there were innocents within the lives I took, but to me, it doesn't even matter as long as I get to protect you and all our friends, alongside the Kingdom of the Elves that protected me back then."
"Kireina…" Elfina sighed. "I'm sorry too… I should had told you this earlier. You're not the only one to blame! Don't… carry all the weight by yourself. I'll also hold responsibility for the lives we've taken, and… I will try to stop being so cowardly, and dumb…"
I sighed, giving her a head pat.
"You may be dumb but you're not a coward, you're strong." I said with a giggle. "You haven't even taken a break since we freed you and you fought at our sides yesterday and today without faltering, that's telling a lot, don't you think?"
"Hmm, maybe…" Elfina sighed, suddenly holding my arm and resting he head on my shoulder. "Still, sorry for thinking the things I did, and for being so selfish… You're not the origin of my troubles, you were the one that saved me, I shouldn't had thought otherwise."
"Hahaha, it's all fine. For now, you should go and take a nap, alright?" I said, giving her a kiss in her cheek. She was honestly an adorable girl, and I could only see her as a daughter, or maybe a little sister. "Rest and relax for now, we'll move on later, and crush the one that made you suffer and think those things. I promise you."
"Hmm… I will help as much as I can as well. Go rest now." I said.
"Okay, sure~" She yawned. "Good night, Kireina. And thank you for everything."
As she went back to sleep, I continued looking at the skies for a while. What Elfina made me think a bit myself too. I guess I did some extreme things, like almost destroying that Human Kingdom, but honestly they were all fucked up people, so I didn't mind it.
I guess I am just like that, huh. It is always nice to have others that think differently and have other ways of seeing life than I do, so I can get a whole perspective of my actions, instead of the only one I can see.
"Oh, you're still here?" Frank wondered.
"Ah, Frank. Yeah." I sighed. "I was talking with Elfina about stuff, but I think she may feel better now."
"I see." He nodded. "Are you feeling alright? You've got a face I often never seen on you."
"I look worried?" I wondered.
"Yeah, a bit." He said. "Are you okay?"
"I feel a bit ungainly…" I sighed.
"Oh… Well, I am all ears if you want to talk about something." He said, smiling gently.
"Hah~ So gentle." I laughed. "Don't worry, Frank. I am fine. I've went through these types of things too many times to be affected by them. More importantly, you owe me a night in bed, time to get moving."
I dragged him to my room and then… Well, I guess it could be said I ate him (not literally).
