It looks like Sword’s disappearance was a 『Formal Invitation』.
As if I could have known that!
And is Ms. 【Blood Witch】 Sword’s former girlfriend or something? Sword had apparently been paralyzed by her, but not only isn’t he angry at her, but he also seems to be rather considerate of her, considering that she abducted him.
Does her kidnapping him mean that she’s still got some feelings for him? Are we now going to shift from adventuring to a romantic story after coming here!?
…Besides, Ms. Bloody is definitely Sword’s type. Especially her breasts. What’s up with those? I’ve never seen such huge breasts. I think my otherworld self’s breasts were a bit more than…half as big as hers, but those things…wouldn’t they register as I-cup or something like that?
If she doesn’t do her best with push-up exercises, things will get really bad for her once they start sagging, won’t they? Or rather, maybe she can’t even do any push-up exercises because her chest is in the way.
＊
Sword slapped his forehead after stepping out on the corridor and looking downwards.
“…You sure you didn’t kill ’em?”
Because the place ended up looking like a ruin?
“I destroyed it flashily because I was carrying out a diversion, but I didn’t hit any people, okay? Because they attacked me with paralysis and sleep spells, I went easy on them.”
Several women showed up, and clung in tears to Ms. Bloody. The sight of them hugging each other and celebrating their safety had a super strong lesbian vibe.
…Hmm? Ms. Bloody is lesbian? Sword’s ex and a lesbian? I kinda don’t get it.
“…Hey! Sword, get down here! How do you intend to pay for this mess!?” Ms. Bloody roared up to us from the entrance with veins popping on her forehead.
Given that Sword went downstairs while scratching his head, I followed suit.
“Shouldn’t you be the one to pay?”
“What!?”
“Look, you abducted me without sayin’ anythin’ to my partner, so she came here to rescue me. This kind of damage is only natural if it comes to a rescue mission for an S-Rank, don’t you think? Rather, you should be happy that there’s no casualties.”
Ms. Bloody became flabbergasted.
“……Partner…you said?”
“Aye. This is Indra, my partner. From now on, us two…and the golems are goin’ to form a party.”
Ms. Bloody was dumbstruck. But, why?
“Hello, my name is Indra. Nice to meet you. In the future, if you have any business with Sword, contact me about it. Since he suddenly vanished, I was surprised and rescued him in a hurry. Since your side went easy on me, I answered in kind, but if not for that, everyone would have been killed.”
Sword clapped on my shoulder.
“You heard her, so don’t kidnap me all of a sudden, ‘kay? Well, we’re goin’ to leave this area as soon as we finish our request, so goodbye.”
Once I started to walk since I got pushed, Ms. Bloody came to her senses.
“W-W-Wai-Wait! What do you mean with partner!? Forming a party!? You, as the top S-Rank!? There’s no way that she could measure up to you, is there!?”
She quickly blocked our way so as to detain us. When I looked up to Sword, he shrugged his shoulders.
“Measure up to me, eh? …I wonder whether I actually measure up to her?”
“In the first place, can you only become partners if both sides balance out? I mean I wouldn’t have wanted to party with that girl with the nasty personality whom I rescued the other day, even if she measured up to me.”
“My words. Unless it’s someone I can think of as friend, it’d be impossible for me.”
Ms. Bloody stared blankly at us.
“…But, forming a party, with such a small child? You?”
She’s not wrong, I’m small. At least my current appearance is. Inside I’m an adult woman, though.
“She certainly looks like a boy at first glance, but don’t worry, you’ll find a proper middle-aged guy inside.”
“Stop describing me like that!”
Why is the part about me being a woman completely excluded here?
“…You’re saying you’re taking her along while being fully aware of how dangerous your requests as S-Rank can be? Do you plan to kill that child!?”
Ah, I got it. She kidnaps other people, but she is basically a gentle person as she even worries about some unknown girl.
“Danger is unavoidable during adventures. I’ll take responsibility for my own life without burdening Sword over it.”
Once I clearly declared so, Ms. Bloody looked at me with her mouth open.
Sword commented as if to make a joke, “Your truly the definition of manliness, aren’t you?”
“I don’t get what you’re saying. Rather, I believe myself to be feminine. In the first place, I feel that it’s the men who tend to push the responsibility of life and death on others in this world?”
Sword apparently reconsidered, “…Maybe you’ve got a point there. Well then, let me correct myself. Your very feminine, missy.”
I nodded.
“Your right, the requests I accept are often dangerous, but as far as it’s limited to this girl here, she’s standin’ at my side because she’s got the ability 『allowin’ her to rescue me』, you know? I cannot deny that she still lacks experience, and no matter how you look at it, she’s got the habit of takin’ things too lightly, but I’ll cover for those parts. She also covers the parts I lack. …And even if she didn’t have the necessary ability, she’s got the right personality to stand next to me. For this reason she’s my “friend.”” He placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed.
Come to think of it, men sure like friendship and camaraderie, don’t they? That’s a typical pattern you’ll find in any shounen manga.
But, I’m a woman, right? Is Sword someone believing in friendship between men and women? That’d make him a rare exception for a man, wouldn’t it? I mean, there’s absolutely no way that he’s forgetting about me being a woman, right? Right!?
“Oh well, I follow the principle of 『All people are equal』, so I can stand besides anyone. Besides, I doubt that Sword thinks of me as “liability.” I mean, he probably doesn’t want to die yet.”
“It’s okay. I don’t think anythin’ like that, so don’t consider killin’ me with that big, taboo magic of yours, ‘kay?”
He roughly stroked my head around. Does he intend to calm me with that?
“……What is this about!?”
Ms. Bloody somehow seemed awfully upset.
“You turned me down, and yet you party with such a youngster!?”
Okay, it’s set. She’s his ex.
When I looked at Sword, slightly amused, Sword had become dumbstruck.
“Haah? I’ve turned you down? Your a weak, magic maniac who always stays indoors, aren’t you!? Why are you suddenly talkin’ ’bout me turnin’ you down when you always hide yourself in here and hardly ever do any requests? In the first place, you never brought up talks ’bout formin’ a party with me, have you?”
Hmm? Her former boyfriend hasn’t noticed? Wait, is the element of popular guys, “Thickheaded Man,” going to suddenly trigger here?
“Y-You’re right, I didn’t mention it! I didn’t think of it! But, who would expect that you suddenly form a party with someone after having avoided doing so for all the time!?”
Oohhh, Ms. Bloody is a tsundere! A tsundere woman and a thickheaded guy. Isn’t that an exemplary template?
The thickheaded guy, Sword, is blankly looking at Ms. Bloody exactly because he’s thickheaded.
“…I don’t think that it concerns you with whom I party though… I wasn’t teaming up with anyone to begin with, or rather, no one seemed willing to seriously form a party with me.”
….What’s got “seriously” to do with forming a party, I wonder? But more importantly, I’ve been thinking so each time, but the type of adventuring in Sword’ mind is quite a hard mode, isn’t it? Kinda like a combatant who’s been recruited for an extreme war.
Adventurers are people going on adventures, you know?
“…S-S-Saying it d-d-doesn’t concern m-me…”
Tsundere Bloody flaps her mouth open and close like a fish, just for blood to quickly rush into her head.
But yep, saying that it doesn’t concern her is pretty mean.
“Sword, isn’t it cruel to say that to your ex-girlfriend?”
“Haah?”
“Eh?”
The air froze.
…Umm? Shouldn’t I have said that?
“…You went out with each other in the past, didn’t you? She’s your type, and I can sense such a mood in all parts of your conversation…”
The instant I did a thumbs-up, signaling that I totally got it, I earned myself an iron claw!
“Eeekk!”
“Ain’t no way in hell that we were a couple! Your just dreamin’ ’bout any such mood! Or rather, what’s this about her bein’ my type!?”
“N-No need to be so embarrassed about it…”
“I ain’t friggin’ embarrassed!! I’m troubled!!”
But, Ms. Bloody is embarrassed, you know? She’s wriggling while holding her cheeks, okay?
“W-Wait, something like that… You’re…mistaken and it’s a bother… No, not really, but still…”
Ah, her dere side has come out!
The thickheaded guy ignored her and tried to drag me outside while still keeping my head in his tight grip. But, robed women suddenly bustled around us, blocking our way.
“The madam went out of her way to invite you over, so if you do not mind, how about staying over for the night?”
“I do mind, no thanks. We’re goin’ back.” Sword snarled with a sullen face.
Eh? Why is he so angry about me pointing out that they’d been an item in the past? Did something happen between them?
“Now, now, allowing guests, who especially came all the way here, to go back just like that goes against the good conduct of our kind madam.”
“Don’t screw with me. I’ve told you we’re goin’ back. If you keep detaining us by force, I’ll completely destroy the rest of the mansion, got it?”
Sword’s displeasure and attempt to go back by all means are a riddle.
“Is something the matter?”
“Otherwise I wouldn’t be talkin’ ’bout goin’ back! I’ve gone through terrible experiences each and every single time!”
I see.
“Makes sense. I sure don’t want to experience anything terrible either.
By the way, what kind of terrible experience are we talking about?”
“She’s a goddamn honey trap!!!”
“Eh?”
Honey trap, he says!?!
“Anyway, if your here, you cannot afford to eat or drink anythin’, sleepin’ is out of the question as well, and if you don’t discover a means of escapin’ without bein’ careless, you never know what will be done to you!!”
I was slightly shocked. He doesn’t want to take responsibility to such an extent?
“Why are you so wary that you’d actually say corny lines you’d normally hear from a virgin? Isn’t it fine? If both of you agree, you can screw her all you want, no? The other party is more than willi…ou-ou-ouuuch!”
His fingers are digging into my skull!
“If I did that, I’d be immediately forced to take responsibility and get locked up here for life, you know?”
“The hell? That sounds super scary. Let’s escape.”
This is the very definition of a witch mansion…no, the mansion of an unpopular woman. No wait, isn’t this more like the hive of a wasp spider? Ms. Bloody pretends to be a tsundere, but in reality she’s a yandere!
“W-Wait a moment! Throwing me off guard and running away is unfair!” Ms. Bloody rushed over.
“No matter how much you want to be together with him, locking him up is a big no-no, you know? Your life is yours to manage, but Sword’s life is his own. If you walk separate paths in life while having differences in what you want to do, you’ll respect each other, so you should honestly follow your own path, okay? That said, we’re going back. I want to go on adventures, and we still haven’t completed our request either.”
“I’m also far from done with adventurin’. Or rather, I just recently realized that I haven’t even started yet. See you. Good luck with your magic studies while secludin’ yourself in here.” Sword waved a hand without looking back.
Considering how much she’s fussing over him, it’s kinda heartless. Well, even so, I don’t want to be locked up in here. Then again, escaping will be easy since we’ve got the Ryokus with us.
…….Just as I thought that, Ms. Bloody started to tremble all over, and suddenly tears welled up in her eyes.
“Waaaahhh! And here I was so happy that I could meet you again after such a long time!!”
Oh my, oh my, she ended up bawling.
“You think your sob story is goin’ to fly with me? In the first place, that’s a trap as well.” Sword said over his shoulder.
…Just how terrible had been his past experiences with her?
“It’s working on me to some extent. She looks awfully pitiable, so let’s stay the night.”
Sword widened his eyes.
“You go back. I’ll keep her company.”
Sword flapped his mouth open and closed.
“No, I mean, you…… What? How do you plan to keep her company?”
“Women have their own ways too, but this time I won’t do anything like that. Rather than that, being confronted with such terrifying traps that they scare you makes me excited.”
Sword became dumbfounded. Since he loosened his grip, I whirled around, and declared, “I’m really looking forward to it! …Sorry, but this time you have to make do with me. Don’t hold back anything and come at me!”
“Now I can’t go back as I’m scared what your goin’ to do!”
The unpopular women looked at each other.
“Hey, it’d be smarter to let us go without a hassle, you know? This one here got no common sense, but her perverted mind is nothin’ to scoff at. Your bodies are goin’ to get messed up to such an extent that you won’t be able to marry anymore!”
How rude!
The unpopular women were wavering about what to do, but since Ms. Bloody desperately insisted that she wanted me to stay, Sword gave up.
“Feel free to go back.”
Sword sighed, “Leaving you all alone here is too damn frightenin’, so it’s impossible. In a certain sense I’m envious of your ability to get so easily excited. But, protect my chastity, okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, I got it.”
For heaven’s sake, he’s such a sissy.
