Chapter 169: Those That are Lost (3)
I open my eyes.
Tskkkstskkkstskk
Numerous landscapes and visions pass by me.
This is the life I have lived.
The memories I once again see as I challenge the realm of Nascent Soul.
Normally, average cultivators cannot challenge the Nascent Soul stage this many times.
Without sufficient enlightenment, no matter how many spiritual elixirs one consumes, one cannot reach the Nascent Soul stage.
However, through the Formless Sword, I have gained a deeper understanding of the metaphysical dimension itself.
Through this, I can cultivate my soul in a clear direction.
With a solid foundation of enlightenment, how many times I challenge the Nascent Soul stage doesn't matter!
'Again and again, I will challenge it...!'
Sssht!
'Until I can...!'
Reflecting on my past lives, I continuously form artifact spirits using the nameless technique.
Kim Yeon, Azure Tiger Saint, Oh Hyun-seok, Yeon Jin, Wi Ryeong-seon, the Administrator, Su In and Hong Yeon, Seo Hweol, Hyeon Woon, the Mad Lord...
I go back through my memories, recording each character from the scenes that emerged in my mind.
Simultaneously, I question the Heart Demon within my heart.
'Why am I trying to find my memories?'
'Why am I so rebellious against the good of the Human Race Grand Alliance?'
'What exactly is the good that I have chosen?'
'Is what I'm doing really the right thing?'
'What have I... lost?'
Countless questions swirl in my mind.
And those questions gather in my heart, nourishing the flesh of the Heart Demon.
The Heart Demon speaks.
'Is it right for you to be doing this to find your memories?'
'Is defying the good, the good you're violating, really true justice and goodness?'
'Where do you see that what you're doing is right?'
The Heart Devil approaches me and grasps my throat.
It's just an illusion.
Yet, I truly feel as if my throat is being crushed.
'Why are you trying to find what you've lost... Is it really worth it?'
Breathing becomes difficult.
Wo-woong!
Behind me, thousands of artifact spirits appear.
And I look at them.
My connections from this cycle, and from the last.
'Finally...'
I've manifested all the characters from the 'last cycle' that lasted 1,000 years as artifact spirits.
Not just those alive, not just those I've directly conversed with.
Those who merely passed through my memories, those I briefly encountered, those I've killed with the body of General Seo, and countless others have all been turned into artifact spirits.
My relationships with them were not significant.
But over the span of 1,000 years, the countless characters accumulated in my memory were really numerous.
They occupied a significant space in my memory, taking away the place of those important in my previous lives.
'Now, I can finally head back.'
Facing the Heart Demon, I speak.
"What’s important… I don’t know. Whether I’m doing well, whether what I’m doing is right, what I want to do… I’ve forgotten it all… But that’s why…"
I look directly into the eyes of the Heart Devil and shout.
"That’s why I must first search...! I am no different from dust...! No different from a bug! That’s why I must know more!"
Whether what I'm doing is right, good, or what I want to do
I know nothing.
I am but a small and insignificant speck of dust in the universe, a mere insect-like existence.
But for that reason, I must carefully preserve what I once knew, to prevent any more memories from leaking away.
In the face of the harsh world, with this small body, should I not cherish what I have gathered so far? Ensuring nothing else slip away?
Flash!
I emerge from the space of my heart essence.
Once again, I failed to attain the Nascent Soul.
However, over the long years, I meticulously nurtured the memories of 'this life' and 'past lives,' firmly anchoring them as artifact spirits.
Simultaneously, by creating countless artifact spirits, the nameless method for creating artifact spirits reached its pinnacle!
'Now, just one step away from perfection.'
The speed of creating artifact spirits has almost matched the speed of perception.
As long as I can 'perceive' it, I can immediately create an artifact spirit and record the memory.
'Shall we start again...!'
Wo-woong!
I close my eyes and once more challenge the Nascent Soul stage.
First day.
I replicated most of the memories of the 12th cycle as artifact spirits.
Second day.
This time, the memories of the 11th cycle.
Since the 11th and 12th cycles were relatively short, it didn't take long.
Third day.
I reached the memories of the 10th cycle.
The 10th cycle was the most tumultuous and emotionally charged of my lives.
'Ah...'
Hyang-hwa.
The person I loved.
The dance we shared at the end.
The last whispers we exchanged.
Those emotions…
From that moment, every event that took place before was replicated and recorded as artifact spirits.
From completing my revenge on Yuan Li, to all the moments at the end..
It took a whole day to capture those memories.
Fourth day.
The 200 years I spent in Serving Command Palace grinding my teeth against Yuan Li, the times spent stuffing cursed dolls in the centipede den, and the moments of all the figures of people I met through the cursed doll were recorded as artifact spirits.
Fifth day.
Finally, on the fifth day were the long yet short 10 years with her.
Recording those memories, I successfully completed the documentation of the entire 10th cycle.
Sixth day.
The 9th cycle, the 200 years I spent alone in Serving Command Palace.
I recorded the appearances of Seo Ran and Song Jin, and the figure of Kim Young-hoon, who gave me hope at that time.
And finally.
Seventh day.
The 8th cycle.
All the times I struggled to reach Qi Building and Beyond the Path to Heavens with Kim Young-hoon were contained within the artifact spirits.
Ssshh...
Before I knew it.
Countless, innumerable artifact spirits surrounded me, encapsulating the traces of my lives.
'When the inspector comes, I'll attain the Nascent Soul then.'
In the state of the Nascent Soul, I'll be able to unfold the Record of Transcending Cultivation and Exhausting Martial Arts in an entirely different dimension.
'Right after facing the Heavenly Tribulation. I'll disappear in front of the inspector with the Record of Transcending Cultivation and Exhausting Martial Arts, dismantle the barrier with the Formless Sword, and escape with the trapped Devil Race...!'
Thus, I waited for the inspector.
"..."
And on the eighth day.
The so-called inspector did not come.
"...What."
There is silence.
The barrier is still functioning well, but that’s it.
The inspector did not come.
"...Haha..."
I smile.
'Something must have happened on their way here.'
For me, it's a stroke of luck.
Then, there's only one thing to do now.
'To find the rest of my memories!'
I smile and continue to operate the technique.
Challenging the Nascent Soul stage again and again, I constantly reflect on the rapid flashback of my past lives.
Through the technique, I continuously inscribed artifact spirits.
After the 13th cycle, where I recorded 1,000 years' worth of memories as artifact spirits,
The speed of creating artifact spirits with the nameless technique accelerated tremendously, far surpassing the pace it had taken up till then.
Thanks to that, I was able to form artifact spirits much faster while challenging the Nascent Soul.
On the seventh day.
I managed to gather the memories of the 7th cycle.
Starting from dying due to being struck by Heavenly Lightning, climbing up to the Ultimate Pinnacle, breaking through Heavenly Rejection.
Cultivating through Qi Refining basic cultivation methods.
Practicing cultivation methods and learning Daoist techniques during the Qi Refining stage.
Tenth day.
The memories of the 6th cycle.
Starting from the memory of dying after bowing ten times in front of my master, going backwards.
The time my master protected me as a towering, giant tree.
The years I spent learning under him, laying the foundation for my cultivation..
One life a day.
The 5th cycle.
Memories of protecting my disciples and reaching the Five Energies Converging to the Origin.
The 4th cycle.
Memories of my neck being severed as I reached the Three Flowers Gather at the Summit.
The 3rd cycle.
Memories of dedicating my entire life to reaching the pinnacle realm of martial arts.
The 2nd cycle.
Memories of training to enter the world of cultivators.
The 1st cycle.
Memories of living my best life, not thinking there would be another return....
And, at the beginning....
‘Ah….’
Before I knew it.
The number of artifact spirits floating behind me became so numerous that it was impossible to count.
Kim Young-hoon, Buk Hyang-hwa, Kim Yeon, Oh Hyun-seok, Cheongmun Ryeong, Buk Joong-ho, Song Jin, Seo Ran, Azure Tiger Saint, Cheongmun Jung-jin, Mad Lord, Seo Hweol, Jin Byuk-ho, Heo Gwak, Yuan Li, Makli Hwang-cheon, Hyeon Woon, Makli Hyun, Cheongmun Gyu, Jinlu Yeon-cheon, Yeon Jin, Yeon Wei, Jin Yeo-woon, Byuk Mun-seong, Byuk Cheon-gi, Manli Min-rab....
Among the enormous crowd, I finally move towards the memory of my very first life.
With every step I take, countless times are reversed.
Looking back at my many lives, I gradually revive forgotten memories.
“Was this… my life….”
Going back through time.
Moving towards memories of a distant past.
There, after going back and forth, is my first memory.
‘This is…’
Memories continue to rush towards me rapidly.
However, the memories of the 1st cycle were already fully recovered as artifact spirits through the nameless technique.
I reached Grand Perfection in the nameless technique so no matter how rapidly the memories rush by, I can record them!
‘Come at me!’
And finally.
The very first memory comes rushing towards me.
‘This is….’
Cough cough!
An old man, miserably muttering 'Earth' as he reaches for the sky with his hand.
The old man's emotions are transmitted to me deeply.
I quickly replicate the old man as an artifact spirit.
A little girl enters the room where the old man is..
I recognize the girl.
‘Ju family’s daughter….’
Tsst!
Again, the scene reverses back in time.
The old man's younger days, begging thieves for his life.
The old man, living meagerly by picking herbs.
The old man, trying hard to study and make something of himself.
The old man, trying to break through life by selling homemade soap.
And, in his youth.
Seo Eun-hyun, when he first arrived in this world.
I revisit the moments of when I first fell into Ascension Path.
And tracing back through my memories, I delve even further into my past.
'Even earlier...'
Before I came to this world….
Memories transcend time, heading right after I fell into this world.
The memory crossed through time, to right after I had first arrived in thisworld.wemetsomeonetherewhobroughtushere.thememoryisclear.
Before I came to this world….
Climbing through the waves of memories, I finally reach memories of my homeland.
Tsst!
One of the artifact spirits strangely crumbles and disappears, replaced by memories of being in an SUV.
A landslide occurs.
I don't remember much after that, possibly because I fainted.
Memories of Jeon Myeong-hoon, who tormented me...
Various memories with colleagues at work...
The memory of being hit by a senior in the military for improperly arranging his uniform...
Memories of failing to get into any universities I applied for and going to a local college after retaking the entrance exams...
High school, middle school, elementary school...
Traversing back through all those memories.
I finally reach the 'very first' memory I ever had.
I have never come this far before.
Before reaching here, I always held onto one memory for too long, trying to create an artifact spirit from it.
But now, with the method reaching its peak.
I can create an artifact spirit by merely perceiving, finally reaching this point.
It was me, just born.
I was crying in my mother's arms.
A baby.
‘Ah….’
I never realized until now why the Nascent Soul took the form of a baby.
But now, I understand.
As people are born into this world and cry out beneath fate,
During the most pure period when one first interacts with another,
The era when one's first connections are formed,
The most pure origin.
It is the crystallization of pure energy gathered through such determination, which takes on the form by aligning with the most pure period of a human's life,
Towards that baby.
Reaching out to my very first moment, I can become a Nascent Soul cultivator.
After reflecting on their lives, they would have reached out to their innocent selves.
But I do not reach out right away.
Instead, I look at the woman holding the baby and the man running beside her, clueless about what to do.
"Mother... Father..."
No....
I call them with even more intimate, more deeply ingrained words in my heart.
"Mom... Dad..."
Both are smiling.
Why do we cultivate the Primordial Spirit and Yin and Yang Spirits in the realm of Nascent Soul?
Perhaps it’s because the purest moment is born from the existence of both Yin and Yang.
The Parents.
I finally understood what I had lost.
Not the memories of Earth.
Not the ethics or moral concepts of a modern person.
Something more fundamental.
"Memories of being loved..."
My memories of loving others were about giving love, not about receiving love.
The love that is intellectually exchanged, after all, involves giving and longing from both sides.
Buk Hyang-hwa, my first love, and Kim Yeon, who did not forget love for a thousand years, were the same.
The love of reason always involves yearning in return.
However, there is one form of love in the world that is absolutely unconditional.
"Ah..."
I burst into tears at the threshold just before entering the Nascent Soul stage.
My cries overlap with the cries of the newborn baby in front of me.
At the same time, I feel the chains around my heart demon unraveling.
Right or wrong, whether it’s correct or incorrect.
There's no need to judge anything with such discernment.
From the moment of our birth, one receives infinite blessings and grace.
The infinite heart of someone else is given to us directly.
The moment we are born with that heart given to us.
A person will want to give their heart to someone else.
This is the nature of beings with a heart, human or otherwise.
Good or evil, whether I am right or you are right, what does all that even mean!
If there's a being that rightfully deserves blessings, isn't it the minimum duty to ensure they are not left in misery!
I, wiping away my tears, preserve the images of my first connections as artifact spirits.
And then I move forward.
The name I choose for the nameless technique, combining Three Spirits Technique and Devil Legion Terracotta Scroll, is this.
"Canvas of Myriad Forms and Connections (萬狀因緣圖)..."
Flash!
In the very center of the Golden Core, the essence of my life's beginnings.
The form of the baby condenses.
Tsst!
The celestial energy shifts, and my lifespan is rewritten.
Simultaneously, dark clouds begin to form in the sky.
Kugugugugu!
Normally, those who attain Nascent Soul face a golden Heavenly Tribulation, proclaiming to all of heaven and earth that they've obtained the Nascent Soul.
However, my Heavenly Tribulation has two colors.
In addition to the usual gold, there is a familiar blue in my Heavenly Tribulation.
"Come."
I look up at the heavens with a serene expression.
The pillar of light descends from the sky.
Piiiiiit!
I have attained the Nascent Soul.
With this.
'I can break through!'
"Treading Heavens!!!"
My body becomes a sword, charging towards the Heavenly Punishment descending towards me.
The lightning splits, the thunder is cleaved.
My body does not stop there, it directly pierces through the Grand Alliance's barrier covering the sky, reaching the dark clouds of Heavenly Punishment and splitting the clouds in two.
Puff!
‘Finally, I've arrived.’
Above the clouds, I laugh, looking at the sky of myriad colors of the Devil Realm.
"Now, I am of the Nascent Soul stage."
Whish―
Facing the wind of the Devil Realm, I slowly descend back to the ground.
The inspector still has not arrived.
With my Formless Sword now evolved under the influence of the Nascent Soul, I just need to create a hole in the barrier to escape with the remaining devils.
That's what I thought.
"…Huh?"
I freeze as I notice a man with a sinister appearance suddenly in front of me.
In the man's left hand is a severed head, adorned with a small band on the forehead, marked with the character [Inspector].
The expression on the head suggests it suffered immensely at death.
Facing the man scattering terrifying intent, who holds the inspector's head, I take a moment to compose myself before greeting him.
"It's been a while. Jeon Myeong-hoon."
